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SWF seeks ???: Katharine Magary, 19, student in Pasadena. Likes beach walks at sunset, sing-song poetry, constructed languages and geology. INTP. Foot mutant and keeper of the Devil's Haircut. Will not pay your rent on minimum wage.
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ICQ: 12670431
Y!: durlomiel
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perjantai, elokuu 31
CHEER UP
yesterday my counselor was out. today i found out it was due to some sort of emergency surgery that she had to have done on her liver. she's a really great person, and i hate for this to happen. but my main problem is that i feel really guilty, because the second thought i had when i found out was that this really sucked that it happens in the middle of my senior year, and what the hell am i going to do with some long-term sub who doesn't even know my name, let alone all the issues i have with high school? i either have to adopt ms. catelli or get to know the new person. *sigh*
i still don't know whether or not i should apply early to any schools. i really don't want to, but my parents want me to. i was about to ask my counselor, like, today, what is shoudl do about that. applications are due around six weeks from now. i'd have to get my application act together and do stuff.
anyway.
i was going to go out to a movie this evening, but those plans got cancelled for whatever reason. maybe because meredith has decided to work on friday afternoons. i told her not to do stuff on friday, but she didn't listen. oh well. we can do stuff at around 8:30, but no more hanging out at the mall and stuff. actually, that's my fault for taking a mwf class. it ends at 3, though, so it's not liek i get back to the city really late.
yesterday my counselor was out. today i found out it was due to some sort of emergency surgery that she had to have done on her liver. she's a really great person, and i hate for this to happen. but my main problem is that i feel really guilty, because the second thought i had when i found out was that this really sucked that it happens in the middle of my senior year, and what the hell am i going to do with some long-term sub who doesn't even know my name, let alone all the issues i have with high school? i either have to adopt ms. catelli or get to know the new person. *sigh*
i still don't know whether or not i should apply early to any schools. i really don't want to, but my parents want me to. i was about to ask my counselor, like, today, what is shoudl do about that. applications are due around six weeks from now. i'd have to get my application act together and do stuff.
anyway.
i was going to go out to a movie this evening, but those plans got cancelled for whatever reason. maybe because meredith has decided to work on friday afternoons. i told her not to do stuff on friday, but she didn't listen. oh well. we can do stuff at around 8:30, but no more hanging out at the mall and stuff. actually, that's my fault for taking a mwf class. it ends at 3, though, so it's not liek i get back to the city really late.
CURRENTNESS
watching: _the dish_. really good movie! i thoroughly enjoyed it. it brought me back to camp.
listening: weezer, "island in the sun". this makes me feel good. i needed it.
watching: _the dish_. really good movie! i thoroughly enjoyed it. it brought me back to camp.
listening: weezer, "island in the sun". this makes me feel good. i needed it.
torstai, elokuu 30
A CORRELATION BETWEEN VIAGRA AND POPTART SALES
is it wrong to criticize oneself and one's friends? after my friends were being overly gossippy today, commenting on virtually everyone who walked by, i said casually that if i were an outside observer, i would think we were all bitches. they were very surprised. i don't know why. i seriously try not to be a gossip, at least not when the person being talked about is like 10 feet away. anyway. i do think i'm a total bitch sometimes. seriously, i'm really mean to some people who really don't deserve it. take james, for instance. the poor guy may bug the hell out of my with his whining, but he really doesn't deserve me yelling at him all the time. so from now on, i'm not going to be mean to people.
i just realized that i miss my junior year classes. seriously. i want to be in spanish again with the seniors from last year. i miss my bio class. i miss the people i commiserated with last year in math. now i have to get used to new people again. not that i mind the people in my classes. they're all great and stuff. even the annoying underclassmen who are in my physics class, like anna and the dude next to me. who never says anything. at all.
after walking like half a mile to t-land and mr. schmidt telling me he didn't need anything today, i went to work in the auditorium with the counselors and department heads, filing people's schedules. mrs. gonzalez sent me with some junior with a chem class problem up to mrs. brown's office. mrs. brown, of course, was busy and no help at all. i also talked to april and priscilla later, and they were telling me that ap spanish language got cancelled this year because there weren't enough people who wanted to take it, so everyone got moved to lit. i'm so happy i took that last year. just so very happy.
later, at the bus stop (with karin) max came up to me and offered to sell me candy if i'd give him change for the bus. on the bus, karin asked (rather loudly) "who was that?" and upon my telling her, she commented, "he's not as funny-looking as the pictures." well, keenan, a good friend of his, prolly overheard that, considering he was sitting nearby. so he had better not tell evil kevin because i just got that whole group speaking to me again. social thigns are complicated. indeed.
is it wrong to criticize oneself and one's friends? after my friends were being overly gossippy today, commenting on virtually everyone who walked by, i said casually that if i were an outside observer, i would think we were all bitches. they were very surprised. i don't know why. i seriously try not to be a gossip, at least not when the person being talked about is like 10 feet away. anyway. i do think i'm a total bitch sometimes. seriously, i'm really mean to some people who really don't deserve it. take james, for instance. the poor guy may bug the hell out of my with his whining, but he really doesn't deserve me yelling at him all the time. so from now on, i'm not going to be mean to people.
i just realized that i miss my junior year classes. seriously. i want to be in spanish again with the seniors from last year. i miss my bio class. i miss the people i commiserated with last year in math. now i have to get used to new people again. not that i mind the people in my classes. they're all great and stuff. even the annoying underclassmen who are in my physics class, like anna and the dude next to me. who never says anything. at all.
after walking like half a mile to t-land and mr. schmidt telling me he didn't need anything today, i went to work in the auditorium with the counselors and department heads, filing people's schedules. mrs. gonzalez sent me with some junior with a chem class problem up to mrs. brown's office. mrs. brown, of course, was busy and no help at all. i also talked to april and priscilla later, and they were telling me that ap spanish language got cancelled this year because there weren't enough people who wanted to take it, so everyone got moved to lit. i'm so happy i took that last year. just so very happy.
later, at the bus stop (with karin) max came up to me and offered to sell me candy if i'd give him change for the bus. on the bus, karin asked (rather loudly) "who was that?" and upon my telling her, she commented, "he's not as funny-looking as the pictures." well, keenan, a good friend of his, prolly overheard that, considering he was sitting nearby. so he had better not tell evil kevin because i just got that whole group speaking to me again. social thigns are complicated. indeed.
keskiviikko, elokuu 29
THIS IS NOT WORKING
i hope the bart strike doesn't last longer than the projected 6 days. that would make my life, as well as about 300,000+ commuters that use it daily. anyway. that is my hope of the day. because taking ac transit is not a good option for me to get to class if i have to leave economics 25 minutes before i'm supposed to be on the bus, and it takes longer than that to get downtown.
i had my first seminar class today. it was fun. there was another high school student (there's some dude from danville), so i didn't feel so alone, and the prof was cool. he gave us tips for surviving as freshmen because we didn't have the readings yet. anyway, i was prolly the most talkative person in the room, so. and i knew what intelligent design was(!) unlike everyone else. god, that was such a self-esteem boost. so was physics, at least for another day. stuff is rocking. yeah.
"and so i sat there, mourning the disappearance of my car, and realizing that someday, i too would disappear. of course, so will you. that's my only comfort." -mr. shimmon
i hope the bart strike doesn't last longer than the projected 6 days. that would make my life, as well as about 300,000+ commuters that use it daily. anyway. that is my hope of the day. because taking ac transit is not a good option for me to get to class if i have to leave economics 25 minutes before i'm supposed to be on the bus, and it takes longer than that to get downtown.
i had my first seminar class today. it was fun. there was another high school student (there's some dude from danville), so i didn't feel so alone, and the prof was cool. he gave us tips for surviving as freshmen because we didn't have the readings yet. anyway, i was prolly the most talkative person in the room, so. and i knew what intelligent design was(!) unlike everyone else. god, that was such a self-esteem boost. so was physics, at least for another day. stuff is rocking. yeah.
"and so i sat there, mourning the disappearance of my car, and realizing that someday, i too would disappear. of course, so will you. that's my only comfort." -mr. shimmon
tiistai, elokuu 28
LA DA DA DA DA
my first day of class as a senior (go class of '02!). my classes were pretty good-- despite the fact that i have all four with the queen of perfection herself, xi. oh joy. at least julia baron's (of the minion) not in my english class anymore. but ben and anatoly are. i think i'll go die now. it's pretty fun, though. physics has 45 people, which is 14 over the limit. they accidentally put the other section at the sametime as calculus, so no one wants to take it. the bad people in that class are at least diluted. even though i have to sit next to say, james, who had better not whine the whole time. shapiro tried to scare us by telling us it was a super-difficult class only taught in its full form at one high school in the whole bay area (lowell being it) but i wasn't freaked out. i can't be, if i want to major in this. i'd rather take it now and work my ass off than be weeded out in college and have to major in something else. like say, a social science. *shudder*
anyway, i proceeded to calculus, and i love mr. bettencourt. he rocks. he told james to stop whining, even. that was the highlight of my day. lunch, yeah, and then economics, with mr. shimmon, who's cool. i participated in class. go me. i talked a lot, actually. even though i hate the subject, the class is really fun. after that i hung out for a while...helped karin with her shitty classes, talked to more freshmen, found my friends. i asked mr. carmack if he'd let me be his t.a. but he only needed a morning person. fortunately when i was talking to yvonne in the hallway about how i had nothing to do all afternoon, mr. schmidt overheard and said he needed a t.a. and he'd be happy to take me twice a week. woo! so now i have something to do while my friends are in class.
later i went to office depot for school supplies and used some of my hard-earned money to get myself a new calculator, because mr.b says mine is about to break. i got a ti-89. w00. i feel so special now.
my first day of class as a senior (go class of '02!). my classes were pretty good-- despite the fact that i have all four with the queen of perfection herself, xi. oh joy. at least julia baron's (of the minion) not in my english class anymore. but ben and anatoly are. i think i'll go die now. it's pretty fun, though. physics has 45 people, which is 14 over the limit. they accidentally put the other section at the sametime as calculus, so no one wants to take it. the bad people in that class are at least diluted. even though i have to sit next to say, james, who had better not whine the whole time. shapiro tried to scare us by telling us it was a super-difficult class only taught in its full form at one high school in the whole bay area (lowell being it) but i wasn't freaked out. i can't be, if i want to major in this. i'd rather take it now and work my ass off than be weeded out in college and have to major in something else. like say, a social science. *shudder*
anyway, i proceeded to calculus, and i love mr. bettencourt. he rocks. he told james to stop whining, even. that was the highlight of my day. lunch, yeah, and then economics, with mr. shimmon, who's cool. i participated in class. go me. i talked a lot, actually. even though i hate the subject, the class is really fun. after that i hung out for a while...helped karin with her shitty classes, talked to more freshmen, found my friends. i asked mr. carmack if he'd let me be his t.a. but he only needed a morning person. fortunately when i was talking to yvonne in the hallway about how i had nothing to do all afternoon, mr. schmidt overheard and said he needed a t.a. and he'd be happy to take me twice a week. woo! so now i have something to do while my friends are in class.
later i went to office depot for school supplies and used some of my hard-earned money to get myself a new calculator, because mr.b says mine is about to break. i got a ti-89. w00. i feel so special now.
maanantai, elokuu 27
LIKE A SOAP ON A ROPE
so today was self-scheduling. oh JOY. it was another one of those fun experiences that i just always wanted to know what happened behind the scenes. except not. i had to get there really early. after sitting around for about an hour listening to people chat and avoiding government people from other classes, and choking down some cheerios (they were too sweet), i got to schedule. and of course i got everything i wanted, but i had to drop two things that were left on my class list, and i had eight separate people yell at me on the way out of the gym for only having four classes when i was supposed to have "at least FIVE" and so forth. i got mr. jow to okay my list, but only after waiting in line to see him for hella long. my counselor was nowhere to be seen. even after getting a note, i had to explain it to kung and merlo and some random guy. bah. bureaucracy.
meanwhile, i left home missing something that was sort of necessary. my mom asked me as i left, "aren't you forgetting something?" so i ran into my room and grabbed a sweatshirt. when i reached school, i realized that everyone else was wearing the fugly beanies that cost $20. and i had left mine in my room. drr. so i called the house when karin was up and asked if she could bring it to me, and meet andrea outside the cafeteria. but at that time, neither andrea nor i was actually waiting there. i told ben to go over and find her but that didn't happen, and i never got my beanie. so later, i remembered that karin was in reg, and i went down to find her, leaving julia or jessica or someone like that in charge of my table. i successfully found her and waited outside until her teacher shut up, then retrieved the stupid hat and put it on. then people discovered that i was an upperclassman and a valuable source of information. because of course that's what the people in the funny hats are for. on my way back to the gym, i was bombarded by freshmen asking me where their classes were. i found it rather humorous.
spent the next few hours in my little prison signing people up for biology classes (after the physics teachers evisted me from the other end of the science department, where the people don't suck) and finding some sort of sadistic pleasure in telling people that yes, that section was closed, and they'd have to take dr. hill instead. stupid sophomores, mostly, including maxwell, who came, swore, and then got on his knees and begged for me to put him in the class he wanted. i said haha, no way jose. the highlight was taking to julia about my summer and her summer and stuff. being an astronaut. etc.
at 12:30 i left and i got a ride downtown and took the bus over to berkeley. it was slow! i wish bart weren't going on strike.
walked up to my class in about 15 minutes. it is always hella sunny there compared to san francisco. so by the time i got all the way up to my building, i was sweaty. but see, i had been wearing a sort of new sweater that hasn't been washed yet, so when i took it off, i was covered in black fuzz, something i didn't realize until i sat down in the lecture hall. then i quickly put it back on. i was prolly the only person in the room who actually took a bunch of notes, even though i realized later it was on the syllabus that the prof. gave us. i deserve to be called a stupid frosh. i suck.
on my way back i took bart, which was so much fun. i saw eric on my way to the station.
so today was self-scheduling. oh JOY. it was another one of those fun experiences that i just always wanted to know what happened behind the scenes. except not. i had to get there really early. after sitting around for about an hour listening to people chat and avoiding government people from other classes, and choking down some cheerios (they were too sweet), i got to schedule. and of course i got everything i wanted, but i had to drop two things that were left on my class list, and i had eight separate people yell at me on the way out of the gym for only having four classes when i was supposed to have "at least FIVE" and so forth. i got mr. jow to okay my list, but only after waiting in line to see him for hella long. my counselor was nowhere to be seen. even after getting a note, i had to explain it to kung and merlo and some random guy. bah. bureaucracy.
meanwhile, i left home missing something that was sort of necessary. my mom asked me as i left, "aren't you forgetting something?" so i ran into my room and grabbed a sweatshirt. when i reached school, i realized that everyone else was wearing the fugly beanies that cost $20. and i had left mine in my room. drr. so i called the house when karin was up and asked if she could bring it to me, and meet andrea outside the cafeteria. but at that time, neither andrea nor i was actually waiting there. i told ben to go over and find her but that didn't happen, and i never got my beanie. so later, i remembered that karin was in reg, and i went down to find her, leaving julia or jessica or someone like that in charge of my table. i successfully found her and waited outside until her teacher shut up, then retrieved the stupid hat and put it on. then people discovered that i was an upperclassman and a valuable source of information. because of course that's what the people in the funny hats are for. on my way back to the gym, i was bombarded by freshmen asking me where their classes were. i found it rather humorous.
spent the next few hours in my little prison signing people up for biology classes (after the physics teachers evisted me from the other end of the science department, where the people don't suck) and finding some sort of sadistic pleasure in telling people that yes, that section was closed, and they'd have to take dr. hill instead. stupid sophomores, mostly, including maxwell, who came, swore, and then got on his knees and begged for me to put him in the class he wanted. i said haha, no way jose. the highlight was taking to julia about my summer and her summer and stuff. being an astronaut. etc.
at 12:30 i left and i got a ride downtown and took the bus over to berkeley. it was slow! i wish bart weren't going on strike.
walked up to my class in about 15 minutes. it is always hella sunny there compared to san francisco. so by the time i got all the way up to my building, i was sweaty. but see, i had been wearing a sort of new sweater that hasn't been washed yet, so when i took it off, i was covered in black fuzz, something i didn't realize until i sat down in the lecture hall. then i quickly put it back on. i was prolly the only person in the room who actually took a bunch of notes, even though i realized later it was on the syllabus that the prof. gave us. i deserve to be called a stupid frosh. i suck.
on my way back i took bart, which was so much fun. i saw eric on my way to the station.
sunnuntai, elokuu 26
WE LIKE THE CARS THAT GO BOOM
dar and fernando were taking a break from us today, so we had rhodri as our substitute boss. he cracks me up. he's the coolest boss ever. they should hire him during the year. so when he left us alone for a while to do things that "shouldn't be associated with him", we covered the table in paper and thought of alliterative epithets for everyone. like "jay the joyous" and "busty betsy". well, actually, nilda did most of the thinking and writing. and there's no one named betsy. but that's beside the point. earlier i had walked into the lounge to find alec pounding at a package wrapped in white paper with a boomerang. it turned out to be dry ice. so. we [alec, andrew, phil, jay, mori, chris, zach, kevin, me] made a dry ice bomb by putting hella dry ice in a 2-liter bottle, wrapping it in duct tape, pouring in boiling water, putting the lid on, and then hiding behind trees in the parking lot. a few minutes later nothing was happening so we got phil to run over and poke it with a long stick. that set it off. the noise was loud. see, dry ice bombs just make noise without any real explosion. so. (later we made a mine and sunk it in the pond so we could scare some seagulls away, but then i had to go.)
went out for a last-day-of-freedom dinner with my friends. the bill required higher math to split. (props to sarah for figuring out 15% in her head.)
dar and fernando were taking a break from us today, so we had rhodri as our substitute boss. he cracks me up. he's the coolest boss ever. they should hire him during the year. so when he left us alone for a while to do things that "shouldn't be associated with him", we covered the table in paper and thought of alliterative epithets for everyone. like "jay the joyous" and "busty betsy". well, actually, nilda did most of the thinking and writing. and there's no one named betsy. but that's beside the point. earlier i had walked into the lounge to find alec pounding at a package wrapped in white paper with a boomerang. it turned out to be dry ice. so. we [alec, andrew, phil, jay, mori, chris, zach, kevin, me] made a dry ice bomb by putting hella dry ice in a 2-liter bottle, wrapping it in duct tape, pouring in boiling water, putting the lid on, and then hiding behind trees in the parking lot. a few minutes later nothing was happening so we got phil to run over and poke it with a long stick. that set it off. the noise was loud. see, dry ice bombs just make noise without any real explosion. so. (later we made a mine and sunk it in the pond so we could scare some seagulls away, but then i had to go.)
went out for a last-day-of-freedom dinner with my friends. the bill required higher math to split. (props to sarah for figuring out 15% in her head.)
lauantai, elokuu 25
GRT AMRCA
so minus two people, i went to great america. i am sort of sick of the rides. i really only enjoy top gun and invertigo, the latter of which i didn't ride today because the line was too long. so. every ride i went on except one broke while i was in line and then got fixed again. it wasn't very humorous.
meredith and i are going to start a people watching club. plus we still have to make our documentary about our planned field trip to the suburbs. it's so perfect. i even have the perfect suburban field trip tourist outfit. for realz.
last night i watched: the accidental tourist. it was interesting.
so minus two people, i went to great america. i am sort of sick of the rides. i really only enjoy top gun and invertigo, the latter of which i didn't ride today because the line was too long. so. every ride i went on except one broke while i was in line and then got fixed again. it wasn't very humorous.
meredith and i are going to start a people watching club. plus we still have to make our documentary about our planned field trip to the suburbs. it's so perfect. i even have the perfect suburban field trip tourist outfit. for realz.
last night i watched: the accidental tourist. it was interesting.
perjantai, elokuu 24
UPDATE ON TOMORROW'S FESTIVITEES
still no second car. this is bad.
i might have to take caltrain. [silent screaming of "nooooooo"]
still no second car. this is bad.
i might have to take caltrain. [silent screaming of "nooooooo"]
I AM NOT A HAPPY CAMPER
i went to school earlier to set up chairs and tables for scheduling. talked to julie, ben and max for a while before andrea dragged me off to actually work. not that they needed me. i carried two tables from room 333 to the gym. let me just say that carrying tables in the elevator is a lot harder than it sounds. anyway. i also talked to julia c. and vanessa for a while. julia is rather jealous of my summer job. she really wants to be an aerospace engineer. good for her. she can do that so i don't have to.
so later when i was about to go to the mall with andrea (so i wouldn't have to come home) i talked to xi and reminded her that i was leaving scheduling in the afternoon to go to class, she said i had to do penalty mods to make up for that. i was all what the fuck? because she told me that i had a good enough excuse a few weeks ago. plus no one has been doing all these extra hours that she requested. i'm one of the only people. so why can't i skip like, two hours for a perfectly valid purpose? it's not like i'm going to a movie or something.
diane is also mad at me because i won't schedule for her. i'm working at the science table, not doing absentee green sheets, so i can't really do that. she also wants to set me up with some guy she met in australia. i said no way.
i went to school earlier to set up chairs and tables for scheduling. talked to julie, ben and max for a while before andrea dragged me off to actually work. not that they needed me. i carried two tables from room 333 to the gym. let me just say that carrying tables in the elevator is a lot harder than it sounds. anyway. i also talked to julia c. and vanessa for a while. julia is rather jealous of my summer job. she really wants to be an aerospace engineer. good for her. she can do that so i don't have to.
so later when i was about to go to the mall with andrea (so i wouldn't have to come home) i talked to xi and reminded her that i was leaving scheduling in the afternoon to go to class, she said i had to do penalty mods to make up for that. i was all what the fuck? because she told me that i had a good enough excuse a few weeks ago. plus no one has been doing all these extra hours that she requested. i'm one of the only people. so why can't i skip like, two hours for a perfectly valid purpose? it's not like i'm going to a movie or something.
diane is also mad at me because i won't schedule for her. i'm working at the science table, not doing absentee green sheets, so i can't really do that. she also wants to set me up with some guy she met in australia. i said no way.
JUST BECAUSE I CARE
here is a summary of our one-hour missions from last week. these were fun, but too short.
alpha mission: orbiter
commander: meredith
pilot: chris
missiion specialist 1: julie
ms2: adam
payload specialist 1: ina
ps2: me
this mission was pretty fun. ina and i spent most of the time in spacehab doing a rather messy experiment called gluep. it didn't work and we couldn't find the water to clean it up, but other than that, it was pretty cool. the stuff we made, that is. our mission specialists would have died, though, because we spent too long in the spacehab, leaving them out on eva and unable to enter the airlock, and the pilots couldn't find us, so they were doing an eva during reentry. come to think of it, everyone else would have died, also because the payload bay doors were open during the landing, but no one dies during training missions. so.
bravo mission: mocr (mission control)
flight director: chris
otc/capcom: amanda
eva: nathan
prop/spacehab p.i. (shpi): adam
station p.i. (sspi): me
well, i really enjoyed my time as sspi. i didn't really deal with the people in mocr as much as the people on the station (meredith, zach p., julie, jon, ina and d). meredith was having a difficult time with me because in my training, i never learned where the id #s were, something she needed to change orbits, and it took me a while to find them. then they had some anomalies, including a fire, but i forgot about the fire and i think jon had to tell me how to find the checklists in the manual, but anyway.
charlie mission: space station
flight op 1: chris
flight op 2: jen
station specialist 1: adam
ss 2: cindy
station commander: me
station officer: no one
this one was interesting. the crew got switched for some reason. anyway, i was trying to do the robotic arm experiment, and it was kind of difficult because i kept having to walk off in the middle to do checklists, and i'd forget what i had programmed before that. after i finished that, i asked if i could sit on "the chair" for a bit. chris strapped me in, and after spinning for a while, cindy stopped me...and then started it up again. they wouldn't let me off for a little while. i was sort of dizzy. yeah.
here is a summary of our one-hour missions from last week. these were fun, but too short.
alpha mission: orbiter
commander: meredith
pilot: chris
missiion specialist 1: julie
ms2: adam
payload specialist 1: ina
ps2: me
this mission was pretty fun. ina and i spent most of the time in spacehab doing a rather messy experiment called gluep. it didn't work and we couldn't find the water to clean it up, but other than that, it was pretty cool. the stuff we made, that is. our mission specialists would have died, though, because we spent too long in the spacehab, leaving them out on eva and unable to enter the airlock, and the pilots couldn't find us, so they were doing an eva during reentry. come to think of it, everyone else would have died, also because the payload bay doors were open during the landing, but no one dies during training missions. so.
bravo mission: mocr (mission control)
flight director: chris
otc/capcom: amanda
eva: nathan
prop/spacehab p.i. (shpi): adam
station p.i. (sspi): me
well, i really enjoyed my time as sspi. i didn't really deal with the people in mocr as much as the people on the station (meredith, zach p., julie, jon, ina and d). meredith was having a difficult time with me because in my training, i never learned where the id #s were, something she needed to change orbits, and it took me a while to find them. then they had some anomalies, including a fire, but i forgot about the fire and i think jon had to tell me how to find the checklists in the manual, but anyway.
charlie mission: space station
flight op 1: chris
flight op 2: jen
station specialist 1: adam
ss 2: cindy
station commander: me
station officer: no one
this one was interesting. the crew got switched for some reason. anyway, i was trying to do the robotic arm experiment, and it was kind of difficult because i kept having to walk off in the middle to do checklists, and i'd forget what i had programmed before that. after i finished that, i asked if i could sit on "the chair" for a bit. chris strapped me in, and after spinning for a while, cindy stopped me...and then started it up again. they wouldn't let me off for a little while. i was sort of dizzy. yeah.
SO THIS IS WHAT COOL IS
later today i have to go help set up tables for scheduling. this bothers me. it's yet another mandatory event announced at the last minute. furthermore, i have to be at school at 6:15am on monday. (!!!!!!!) i don't know why, because we're setting up today. it makes no sense at all.
the problem with friends who can drive is that they often don't have access to, say, cars. i made plans to go to great america on saturday, and now it may not work out because i invited more people than we have seats in the car. or, shall i say, meredith did. and she can't use the car because she doesn't have insurance, and becca can't use her family's cars because her parents are both on call that day. so. we have a seating issue.
hanna's mom just called for some reason.
later today i have to go help set up tables for scheduling. this bothers me. it's yet another mandatory event announced at the last minute. furthermore, i have to be at school at 6:15am on monday. (!!!!!!!) i don't know why, because we're setting up today. it makes no sense at all.
the problem with friends who can drive is that they often don't have access to, say, cars. i made plans to go to great america on saturday, and now it may not work out because i invited more people than we have seats in the car. or, shall i say, meredith did. and she can't use the car because she doesn't have insurance, and becca can't use her family's cars because her parents are both on call that day. so. we have a seating issue.
hanna's mom just called for some reason.
torstai, elokuu 23
O MAN
i really need to go back to school. immediately. i am quickly becoming bored and antsy with my week of freedom.
talking to julie v. right now about college apps and making a kewliezz new signature for my email. yes that's how bored i am.
i really need to go back to school. immediately. i am quickly becoming bored and antsy with my week of freedom.
talking to julie v. right now about college apps and making a kewliezz new signature for my email. yes that's how bored i am.
TRAINS AND PLANES
well, i have successfully done two things today: i went to school to pick up the announcer, which now they aren't putting online (because all the website people graduated), and i went to berkeley to get my books.
i then came up with my complete schedule.
lowell:
1/2- ap english comp- hernandez
3/4/5- ap physics (yay!)- shapiro
6/7/8- ap calc. bc- bettencourt
11/12/13- ap econ- shimmon
this last class ends at 12:50 and i have to move rather quickly to get over to the east bay by 2:10, when my next class starts
berkeley:
mwf 2-3pm- geological record of climate change
w 4-5- history of evolution
w 5-9- science in the news
at the student store i bought:
well, i have successfully done two things today: i went to school to pick up the announcer, which now they aren't putting online (because all the website people graduated), and i went to berkeley to get my books.
i then came up with my complete schedule.
lowell:
1/2- ap english comp- hernandez
3/4/5- ap physics (yay!)- shapiro
6/7/8- ap calc. bc- bettencourt
11/12/13- ap econ- shimmon
this last class ends at 12:50 and i have to move rather quickly to get over to the east bay by 2:10, when my next class starts
berkeley:
mwf 2-3pm- geological record of climate change
w 4-5- history of evolution
w 5-9- science in the news
at the student store i bought:
- _global environmental change_ (used, but still a rip-off)
- a student planner
- a notebook
- tampons
- shampoo
- breath mints
- ads for credit cards
- magazine subscription cards
- etc.
keskiviikko, elokuu 22
I'M GIVING IN TO YOU
i had to do a phone interview with sarah from the ex. today. it lasted too long and the questions were all the same. i hate psychologists. remind me never to be one, kay?
i had to do a phone interview with sarah from the ex. today. it lasted too long and the questions were all the same. i hate psychologists. remind me never to be one, kay?
HELLO.
last day of phone operating. and i just remembered that i forgot to fold up the banners that xi, anna and vicky asked me to take care of. damn damn damn. oh well. the weather is nice so hopefully they won't get rained on or whatever. anyway. another somewhat uneventful day of sitting around the office. i talked to stephanie when she was in, but most of the time she was delivering mail. the highlight of those four hours was someone who came in asking for the announcer, and i swear he was flirting with me. see, my life is pathetic.
emails are making me very happy.
last day of phone operating. and i just remembered that i forgot to fold up the banners that xi, anna and vicky asked me to take care of. damn damn damn. oh well. the weather is nice so hopefully they won't get rained on or whatever. anyway. another somewhat uneventful day of sitting around the office. i talked to stephanie when she was in, but most of the time she was delivering mail. the highlight of those four hours was someone who came in asking for the announcer, and i swear he was flirting with me. see, my life is pathetic.
emails are making me very happy.
tiistai, elokuu 21
YOU AND WHOSE ARMY?
today i stapled things together.
this is almost like work, except i don't get paid.
anyway, i say and collated/stapled for an hour in the book room, and then i spent the next two hours with max in the vicci center putting stickers on freshman transcripts. it was so exciting i almost burst. i also had to listen to anna (a junior) and her friends talk about organizing some sort of volunteer activity that involved bubbles, and they argued for an hour over who had the better courtyard, lowell or uhs.
...
so after that i talked to jimmy, who was painting the bathroom. walked to stonestown with max, and forgot why i was there. after that, visited meredith. we had pizza and watched get over it, which was interesting. funny.
brandon isn't mad at me! o happy day.
today i stapled things together.
this is almost like work, except i don't get paid.
anyway, i say and collated/stapled for an hour in the book room, and then i spent the next two hours with max in the vicci center putting stickers on freshman transcripts. it was so exciting i almost burst. i also had to listen to anna (a junior) and her friends talk about organizing some sort of volunteer activity that involved bubbles, and they argued for an hour over who had the better courtyard, lowell or uhs.
...
so after that i talked to jimmy, who was painting the bathroom. walked to stonestown with max, and forgot why i was there. after that, visited meredith. we had pizza and watched get over it, which was interesting. funny.
brandon isn't mad at me! o happy day.
maanantai, elokuu 20
NOW I WILL REVEAL ALL MY SECRETS
i am bored. i think i'll write about my experiences at camp.
the first day, saturday, i arrived at about 8:30 central time and had to eat a really disgusting bag dinner, then go to sleep in some large room with the other early arrivals. there were these two girls in the bunk next to me who had perfect hair. my bunkmate was lily from minnesota, who won a trip there because she won the intel science search in the biochem category. at that point we were the oldest people there, so we bonded. i asked her if she knew gabriel, as he won in some other category. she didn't remember. oh well. she gave me tips on getting into harvard: be smart. how helpful.
the next day i moved my luggage for the fourth time into some trailer, then went to breakfast (way too early). after breakfast i went with the other advanced academy people into a room and woo, we watched october sky. which i have seen about a trillion times. but it was better than the alternative (the phantom menace, again). i looked for people who might be in my group and found, of all people, jon. the trekkie. after watching 3/4 of the movie, we were herded out again and went into a large room to hear a lecture, a speech, and meet our groups. i was in shepard (as in alan shepard). i found meredith. we went to our room. the people in my room (421) were meredith, julie, ina, and jen. they were very nice people but i only had a few minutes to say hi and move my luggage before it was time for another activity. i basically had very little free time the whole week.
later that night wes, the night counselor, introduced himself as being from minnesota, studying adminstration, and liking hockey and band (band camp jokes ensued). my group (with track):
more later about our missions.
i am bored. i think i'll write about my experiences at camp.
the first day, saturday, i arrived at about 8:30 central time and had to eat a really disgusting bag dinner, then go to sleep in some large room with the other early arrivals. there were these two girls in the bunk next to me who had perfect hair. my bunkmate was lily from minnesota, who won a trip there because she won the intel science search in the biochem category. at that point we were the oldest people there, so we bonded. i asked her if she knew gabriel, as he won in some other category. she didn't remember. oh well. she gave me tips on getting into harvard: be smart. how helpful.
the next day i moved my luggage for the fourth time into some trailer, then went to breakfast (way too early). after breakfast i went with the other advanced academy people into a room and woo, we watched october sky. which i have seen about a trillion times. but it was better than the alternative (the phantom menace, again). i looked for people who might be in my group and found, of all people, jon. the trekkie. after watching 3/4 of the movie, we were herded out again and went into a large room to hear a lecture, a speech, and meet our groups. i was in shepard (as in alan shepard). i found meredith. we went to our room. the people in my room (421) were meredith, julie, ina, and jen. they were very nice people but i only had a few minutes to say hi and move my luggage before it was time for another activity. i basically had very little free time the whole week.
later that night wes, the night counselor, introduced himself as being from minnesota, studying adminstration, and liking hockey and band (band camp jokes ensued). my group (with track):
- me (payload specialist)
- meredith (pilot)
- ina: from germany, had visited kennedy space center the previous week and had things like nasa sheets. scary. (ps)
- julie: from utah, worked in a star trek simulator. was jealous of me for going to berkeley. she wants to go there. (mission specialist(
- jen: from michigan: got sick later that night from the day's lunch. likes veggie tales. (pilot)
- cindy: another trekkie from virginia who was in jon's group the previous year. she was cool. (ms)
- amanda: from longisland (said like that). originally we thought she had a thing for chris but it turned out they also knew each other from academy. (pilot)
- chris: knew amanda. talked on his cell phone all the time to his girlfriend. lived in the caribbean and really liked scuba. (pilot)
- adam: from somewhere in illinois. friend of zach h. (ms)
- zach h: also from illinois. talked short. kind of hyper. (ms)
- zach p.: from somewhere in missouri. he could have been in top gun. (pilot)
- nathan: friend of zach p who was from the same place in missouri. (ms)
- david r. ("d"): apathetic person from somewhere in the us. pissed everyone off until thursday. (ps)
- david m ("good dave"): from los angeles. cool guy. (ps)
- jon: trekkie from new york. knew everything. he had been there the previous week, so he had everything memorized. (ms)
- jay: from chicago. smiled all the time. (pilot)
- brandon: our daytime counselor. he was very much like bra. wanted to move out of alabama.
more later about our missions.
I AM NOT A RECEPTIONIST
no one at school realizes that i am related to my dad. they know my name, but not my face. i swear, even though the principal calls my house like, daily, and knows who i am for various reasons, he could pass me in the hallway and think i was a freshman.
...
anyway, i spent the afternoon in the front office answering phone calls and playing switchboard operator. listened to mrs. tegland schmooze with various teachers and administrators who walked through. looked at the newly-painted murals in the bathrooms. sat around and waited for nicole (who got a haircut) to walk in and remember her bag. etc.
ay caramba. i still hope that sparklehorse is gonna do a us tour.
no one at school realizes that i am related to my dad. they know my name, but not my face. i swear, even though the principal calls my house like, daily, and knows who i am for various reasons, he could pass me in the hallway and think i was a freshman.
...
anyway, i spent the afternoon in the front office answering phone calls and playing switchboard operator. listened to mrs. tegland schmooze with various teachers and administrators who walked through. looked at the newly-painted murals in the bathrooms. sat around and waited for nicole (who got a haircut) to walk in and remember her bag. etc.
ay caramba. i still hope that sparklehorse is gonna do a us tour.
sunnuntai, elokuu 19
HOW DID I MISS THEE, PEOPLE?
You say, "They forced it into my brain. I am now a space geek."
You say, "I'll try not to show it."
Jesus say, "I was always a space geek"
Jesus say, "I find it sexy."
Jesus say, "SHOW ME MORE, NAUGHTY GIRL."
Jesus say, "..tell me about... gravity."
right about now i think i'll go sew stuff onto my backpack. i got a kewliezzz patch from the sts-61 mission for my bag.
You say, "They forced it into my brain. I am now a space geek."
You say, "I'll try not to show it."
Jesus say, "I was always a space geek"
Jesus say, "I find it sexy."
Jesus say, "SHOW ME MORE, NAUGHTY GIRL."
Jesus say, "..tell me about... gravity."
right about now i think i'll go sew stuff onto my backpack. i got a kewliezzz patch from the sts-61 mission for my bag.
THE BATTLE ENSUES
meanwhile, in my absence, the fearless citizens of null managed to get their database off of the tyrannical bytenik's server. isn't that special of them. now why am i not more impressed?
i talked to jay (smiley, not jay mooney from work) over aim earlier. everything is fine and dandy.
meanwhile, in my absence, the fearless citizens of null managed to get their database off of the tyrannical bytenik's server. isn't that special of them. now why am i not more impressed?
i talked to jay (smiley, not jay mooney from work) over aim earlier. everything is fine and dandy.
IROQ
i just claimed my $1000 from gray davis, who has bad run-ins with the power companies, but i still managed to get a nice scholarship.
o yes.
i just claimed my $1000 from gray davis, who has bad run-ins with the power companies, but i still managed to get a nice scholarship.
o yes.
!!IN AN INTASTELLA BURST
i am back (to save the universe)!!
well, i went to work today. dar is looking to hire an assistant manager for our program and she asked me to help her look at applications. most of the people have backgrounds in psychology or cultural anthropology which worries me because they'd probably turn us into a study. the other people were all administrative and that's just not cool. we need a science major who can actually deal with people. luisa applied, and i hope she gets hired because luisa just rocks. i missed yesterday's webcast and i am miffed about that.
yesterday i slept for most of the day, then went shopping, bought some shoes at goodwill, saw osmosis jones (because rat race was sold out) and then went to bed.
the night before i came home from camp. camp was a lot more fun than i expected. now i am really into space. so watch out. i will tell lots of pathetic stories that start with "and one time, at space camp, ...." and people will groan. ha. i will tell those stories later though.
i am back (to save the universe)!!
well, i went to work today. dar is looking to hire an assistant manager for our program and she asked me to help her look at applications. most of the people have backgrounds in psychology or cultural anthropology which worries me because they'd probably turn us into a study. the other people were all administrative and that's just not cool. we need a science major who can actually deal with people. luisa applied, and i hope she gets hired because luisa just rocks. i missed yesterday's webcast and i am miffed about that.
yesterday i slept for most of the day, then went shopping, bought some shoes at goodwill, saw osmosis jones (because rat race was sold out) and then went to bed.
the night before i came home from camp. camp was a lot more fun than i expected. now i am really into space. so watch out. i will tell lots of pathetic stories that start with "and one time, at space camp, ...." and people will groan. ha. i will tell those stories later though.
perjantai, elokuu 10
MORE ON THAT LATER
went to go see ap2 with andrea, melissa and karin. the amc 1000 was sold out in the early afternoon, so we walked over to the kabuki. i saw about a million people i knew on the way over: jenny, marie (not the marie, but our class vp), gabriel, daisuke, etc. anyway. andrea bitched about the extra service hours and how she had to spend a few hours waiting for the school to open (time spent with j*mes). the movie was humorous, but after a while, you get sick of hearing males talk about sex. like, enough already. and the people behind us were talking very loudly throughout.
anyway.
went to go see ap2 with andrea, melissa and karin. the amc 1000 was sold out in the early afternoon, so we walked over to the kabuki. i saw about a million people i knew on the way over: jenny, marie (not the marie, but our class vp), gabriel, daisuke, etc. anyway. andrea bitched about the extra service hours and how she had to spend a few hours waiting for the school to open (time spent with j*mes). the movie was humorous, but after a while, you get sick of hearing males talk about sex. like, enough already. and the people behind us were talking very loudly throughout.
anyway.
THE VERY LAST TIME
it is my last day here at nasa!
i am actually rather sad, now that i think about it. no more getting up at an ungodly hour in order to catch the train and ride for 2.5 hours. no more being bored at work and posting in my journal 6 times daily. no more thermal protection.
as luck would have it, there was a delay on caltrain this morning. the train in front of us was having problems, so were were slow. i missed what would be my last shuttle ride. i was ready to wait until it came around again, but the only other person from work who was on my train asked if i wanted to take a cab over with him, so i agreed. he is one of the regular people on my shuttle, a guy named francis who is working in the space science directorate. he has the sort of british accent that makes everything seem pretentious, like "i'm a theorist studying the internal structure of planets." he also said to me, when i told him i was majoring in astrophysics, that "the astrophysicists say that there are no good problems left in that area" and that astrobiology seemed to him "not a real science." well. who cares, anyway. i know what i want and it's not tps.
anyway. last night i went to see "ghost world" with sarah. a very interesting movie. it was quite humorous. i highly recommend seeing it. however, the audience was very much like sarah and i, either cynical students or cynical adults. we laughed at the previews. some hissed, such as for captain morelli's mandolin. anyway, i related to the movie we saw. i like to observe random people.
this afternoon i am going with andrea to see american pie 2. we decided to bring our little sisters along because they will be classmates next year and have never met each other, and since andrea is one of my best friends, we thought they should at least know what the other looks like, even though melissa (andrea's sister) has heard that karin is like a genius or something. i don't want karin to be an antisocialite like i was all through my freshman year, so.
it is my last day here at nasa!
i am actually rather sad, now that i think about it. no more getting up at an ungodly hour in order to catch the train and ride for 2.5 hours. no more being bored at work and posting in my journal 6 times daily. no more thermal protection.
as luck would have it, there was a delay on caltrain this morning. the train in front of us was having problems, so were were slow. i missed what would be my last shuttle ride. i was ready to wait until it came around again, but the only other person from work who was on my train asked if i wanted to take a cab over with him, so i agreed. he is one of the regular people on my shuttle, a guy named francis who is working in the space science directorate. he has the sort of british accent that makes everything seem pretentious, like "i'm a theorist studying the internal structure of planets." he also said to me, when i told him i was majoring in astrophysics, that "the astrophysicists say that there are no good problems left in that area" and that astrobiology seemed to him "not a real science." well. who cares, anyway. i know what i want and it's not tps.
anyway. last night i went to see "ghost world" with sarah. a very interesting movie. it was quite humorous. i highly recommend seeing it. however, the audience was very much like sarah and i, either cynical students or cynical adults. we laughed at the previews. some hissed, such as for captain morelli's mandolin. anyway, i related to the movie we saw. i like to observe random people.
this afternoon i am going with andrea to see american pie 2. we decided to bring our little sisters along because they will be classmates next year and have never met each other, and since andrea is one of my best friends, we thought they should at least know what the other looks like, even though melissa (andrea's sister) has heard that karin is like a genius or something. i don't want karin to be an antisocialite like i was all through my freshman year, so.
torstai, elokuu 9
ALL FOR ME
ceremony. partay. going to a movie now if these people online stop asking me to look at their equation/description/whatever.
ceremony. partay. going to a movie now if these people online stop asking me to look at their equation/description/whatever.
CRACK IN FLOOR
i have to figure out tomorrow's schedule. so i need to call andrea. but i think she's at work right now.
i don't know if there's anything for me to do here tomorrow. christine is taking me out to lunch. then maybe i'll leave because i have to get some cheap tennis shoes and pajama bottoms on the way home.
but right now i have to buy presents for people.
i have to figure out tomorrow's schedule. so i need to call andrea. but i think she's at work right now.
i don't know if there's anything for me to do here tomorrow. christine is taking me out to lunch. then maybe i'll leave because i have to get some cheap tennis shoes and pajama bottoms on the way home.
but right now i have to buy presents for people.
MY INNER (MORAL) SELF
i am not religious. but i still believe in forgiving people.
after a heated debate this morning, a conversation that involved a lot of swearing, a no-no on wod, q decided to do away with poor rahv. i'm a guide, so i'm supposed to agree with that kind of thing, but i don't. i think @nuke is a little harsh and unforgiving to players. see, i'm either a very nice person or a very naive person. i forgive and forget almost instantly, and i don't hold grudges unless someone is continuously evil.
i was sort of bitchy in my days as a mod on chickclick, i suppose, but i didn't hate anyone. i didn't lead people on or goad them until they did something that would cause a ban. and i'm still not that evil as a wiz.
if i'm wrong, slap me, 'kay?
i am not religious. but i still believe in forgiving people.
after a heated debate this morning, a conversation that involved a lot of swearing, a no-no on wod, q decided to do away with poor rahv. i'm a guide, so i'm supposed to agree with that kind of thing, but i don't. i think @nuke is a little harsh and unforgiving to players. see, i'm either a very nice person or a very naive person. i forgive and forget almost instantly, and i don't hold grudges unless someone is continuously evil.
i was sort of bitchy in my days as a mod on chickclick, i suppose, but i didn't hate anyone. i didn't lead people on or goad them until they did something that would cause a ban. and i'm still not that evil as a wiz.
if i'm wrong, slap me, 'kay?
NOTE TO SELF
super furry animals have released a new record, "rings around the world". go get it. now.
super furry animals have released a new record, "rings around the world". go get it. now.
I WANNA BE A ROCK SUPASTAR
don't i feel special? shirley manson rocks.
i stole that off leigh's site.
i have figured out the formula for the intersection with the cube! it is a very hairy thing to program, but i don't have to do that. i'm only the math slave. but i'll post it for the benefit of humankind.
Variables:
r=rate in units/sec
D=total distance
t=time
f=rt/D
don't i feel special? shirley manson rocks.
i stole that off leigh's site.
i have figured out the formula for the intersection with the cube! it is a very hairy thing to program, but i don't have to do that. i'm only the math slave. but i'll post it for the benefit of humankind.
Variables:
r=rate in units/sec
D=total distance
t=time
f=rt/D
- Definition of cube
If cube with sides parallel to axes,
Center (X, Y, Z), side length w.
Then planes of sides are represented as follows:
x=X-w/2
x=X+w/2
y=Y-w/2
y=Y+w/2
z=Z+w/2
z=Z+w/2 - Definition of line
Given a line in space consisting of all points P with starting point P’(a,b,c) and endpoint P”(A,B,C), the line is represented as:
x=a+f(A-a)
y=b+f(B-b)
z=c+f(C-c) - Points of intersection
To see whether line segment P’P” passes through the sector represented by the cube, solve for f by substitution for each of the planes in part 1.
Example:
(X-w/2-a)/(A-a)=f
then substitute f in equations given in part 2 to find the y and z coordinates. Then check that:
(Y-w/2)<=y<=(Y+w/2)
(Z-w/2)<=z<=(Z+w/2)
If both of these hold true, then P is one point of intersection. However, there may be two. Check all sides of cube as above. It is possible for there to be 2,1 or 0 points of intersection.
keskiviikko, elokuu 8
!
i am talking to fontaine over aim. i have not spoken to her since graduation. i'm glad she's still alive (literally.)
i am talking to fontaine over aim. i have not spoken to her since graduation. i'm glad she's still alive (literally.)
CURRENTNESS
reading: more short stories
listening: weezer (blue album)
surfing: cyanchat. will tell long story later.
oh, and i just wanted to say that this site is possibly the weirdest concept ever. fanfic about fellow chatters. bizarre. we never did anything like that in my days in cc.
reading: more short stories
listening: weezer (blue album)
surfing: cyanchat. will tell long story later.
oh, and i just wanted to say that this site is possibly the weirdest concept ever. fanfic about fellow chatters. bizarre. we never did anything like that in my days in cc.
A BOOK ABOUT PEKING
i spent about an hour packing stuff for my trip. then i realized that i still had to wear stuff for the next three days. oops. but there's laundry, so. i labeled stuff, rolled it up, put it in the bag. actually, i stuffed stuff in the bag, and someone else took it out, rolled it, and put it back neatly. i am bad at packing.
this was after i sort of walked around talking loudly to whomever felt like standing in one room for longer than a minute.
here is a list of things i should write about for my college applications, according to karin:
i spent about an hour packing stuff for my trip. then i realized that i still had to wear stuff for the next three days. oops. but there's laundry, so. i labeled stuff, rolled it up, put it in the bag. actually, i stuffed stuff in the bag, and someone else took it out, rolled it, and put it back neatly. i am bad at packing.
this was after i sort of walked around talking loudly to whomever felt like standing in one room for longer than a minute.
here is a list of things i should write about for my college applications, according to karin:
- my internship at nasa
- my personal relationship with the cube
- my walk through a wind tunnel (while it wasn't on)
- my cool sister karin
- my mother, who enjoys planning my nonexistent life
- my obsession with vehemence
THE TRANSIT CHRONICLES PT. 2: I AM SMRT
puni
well, i got off caltrain at 5:45. i was thinking to myself "isn't this great?" and ran to catch the waiting n that was sitting there. unfortunately, a big ugly truck decided to make a right turn just at the moment that i was about to cross and hop on my train, which made me miss it. so i saw another one waiting and thought "this isn't bad." and i waited and it never came. it was sitting there.
so eventually another train arrived. everyone got off and ran for their own respective trains, and i got on. the driver said it was going out of service, and to board the one waiting across the platform. at that moment, i saw nick. i said, "hi nick" and he proceeded to tell me about getting lost in san francisco, taking a million wrong buses, etc. then he had to run to catchhis train and i boarded the waiting one, which then took off.
...about fifteen minutes later, i realized we were at civic center station and i was surprised it had gone so quickly. i drifted off again, then woke up after we passed what seemed to have been van ness. i thought it was time to get out of the tunnel, so i turned on my radio. nothing came through. suddenly, we were at church street! the driver announced that this was a castro shuttle. a lot of people looked confused, including me. we had all thought it was an n. so i got off and decided to wait for a k/l/m and get off at forest hill, then ask for a ride home. nothing happened. the train was stuck there for whatever reason, and there was nothing but castro shuttles for the next 15 minutes. i caught an m back to van ness and waited for another n to come along.
the moral of the story: always be attentive. you never know when trains might morph into other lines on you.
puni
well, i got off caltrain at 5:45. i was thinking to myself "isn't this great?" and ran to catch the waiting n that was sitting there. unfortunately, a big ugly truck decided to make a right turn just at the moment that i was about to cross and hop on my train, which made me miss it. so i saw another one waiting and thought "this isn't bad." and i waited and it never came. it was sitting there.
so eventually another train arrived. everyone got off and ran for their own respective trains, and i got on. the driver said it was going out of service, and to board the one waiting across the platform. at that moment, i saw nick. i said, "hi nick" and he proceeded to tell me about getting lost in san francisco, taking a million wrong buses, etc. then he had to run to catchhis train and i boarded the waiting one, which then took off.
...about fifteen minutes later, i realized we were at civic center station and i was surprised it had gone so quickly. i drifted off again, then woke up after we passed what seemed to have been van ness. i thought it was time to get out of the tunnel, so i turned on my radio. nothing came through. suddenly, we were at church street! the driver announced that this was a castro shuttle. a lot of people looked confused, including me. we had all thought it was an n. so i got off and decided to wait for a k/l/m and get off at forest hill, then ask for a ride home. nothing happened. the train was stuck there for whatever reason, and there was nothing but castro shuttles for the next 15 minutes. i caught an m back to van ness and waited for another n to come along.
the moral of the story: always be attentive. you never know when trains might morph into other lines on you.
THEY CALL IT YUPPIE LOVE
here is a short story:
once upon a time there was an overworked woman named wanda. she had the usual white-collar job that is so popular among fans of dilbert (tm). every day she left her house at 7:00 a.m. in her blue honda civic, drove for about half an hour, found the rare parking space, and spent the next nine hours slaving away in her cubicle at the hands of her sadistic boss, ethan, who liked to walk around aimlessly for a good part of the day, spying on the other employees and using up the receptionists' supply of hard candy.
wanda had set up her webcam not so it pointed toward her, but so that it kept an eye out on the cubicle canyons. wanda kept her webcam application open in a corner of the screen so that she could be warned whenever ethan was approaching, usually to make sure that she had her desk organized impeccably and that she was following the strict dress code than only allowed for banana republic and j. crew clothing.
her job was the usual sort of thing that employees of high-tech companies do, but she did not enjoy this very much. instead, she liked to file things. however, she had received a promotion a few years back from filer to programmer when the higher minds had discovered that she knew how to program things rather well. even though she had resisted this promotion, the company insisted that she work as a programmer instead.
what they did not know was what caused her obsession with files. when wanda got a cubicle of her own, she had dragged along some empty file cabinets from the file room, and she placed them around her cell so that the only floorspace was for her highly ergonomic chair. during her lunch break, she stayed in the office and filed things. no one knew what kinds of things lay in those shiny grey drawers, because only wanda had the key, and she kept it on a chain around her neck.
wanda was a rather naive office worker. she did not know the danger of intraoffice relationships. one day, she slept with one of her fellow peons from the cubicle kitty-corner to hers, steve. he managed to steal her precious key in the process and make a copy, which he kept, and returned the original to wanda's desk. while wanda went to the coffee room one day, the man crept into her lair and began to open one of the drawers. like any character in a story like this would do, he paused to reflect on the circumstances. the other workers would be waiting, wondering what that black box so full of allure really held. just as he was about to turn the key, he caught a glimpse of wanda on her webcam and dropped the key. he stood up. "wanda," he said. "i was just looking for you. wanna come over to my place tonight?"
wanda looked blankly at steve. "you've wanted to know what is in my file cabinets that fascinates me so. i know you stole my key," she explained.
steve stared at her with a look of shock on his face. he was certain that soon he would die a rather gruesome death. and indeed he did. soon, he was lying on the floor with a staple remover through his neck.
his body, much like the others, was stored in the file cabinet just to the right of wanda's desk. she locked the drawer and went back to working. she also put a vase of flowers on top of the stacks.
here is a short story:
once upon a time there was an overworked woman named wanda. she had the usual white-collar job that is so popular among fans of dilbert (tm). every day she left her house at 7:00 a.m. in her blue honda civic, drove for about half an hour, found the rare parking space, and spent the next nine hours slaving away in her cubicle at the hands of her sadistic boss, ethan, who liked to walk around aimlessly for a good part of the day, spying on the other employees and using up the receptionists' supply of hard candy.
wanda had set up her webcam not so it pointed toward her, but so that it kept an eye out on the cubicle canyons. wanda kept her webcam application open in a corner of the screen so that she could be warned whenever ethan was approaching, usually to make sure that she had her desk organized impeccably and that she was following the strict dress code than only allowed for banana republic and j. crew clothing.
her job was the usual sort of thing that employees of high-tech companies do, but she did not enjoy this very much. instead, she liked to file things. however, she had received a promotion a few years back from filer to programmer when the higher minds had discovered that she knew how to program things rather well. even though she had resisted this promotion, the company insisted that she work as a programmer instead.
what they did not know was what caused her obsession with files. when wanda got a cubicle of her own, she had dragged along some empty file cabinets from the file room, and she placed them around her cell so that the only floorspace was for her highly ergonomic chair. during her lunch break, she stayed in the office and filed things. no one knew what kinds of things lay in those shiny grey drawers, because only wanda had the key, and she kept it on a chain around her neck.
wanda was a rather naive office worker. she did not know the danger of intraoffice relationships. one day, she slept with one of her fellow peons from the cubicle kitty-corner to hers, steve. he managed to steal her precious key in the process and make a copy, which he kept, and returned the original to wanda's desk. while wanda went to the coffee room one day, the man crept into her lair and began to open one of the drawers. like any character in a story like this would do, he paused to reflect on the circumstances. the other workers would be waiting, wondering what that black box so full of allure really held. just as he was about to turn the key, he caught a glimpse of wanda on her webcam and dropped the key. he stood up. "wanda," he said. "i was just looking for you. wanna come over to my place tonight?"
wanda looked blankly at steve. "you've wanted to know what is in my file cabinets that fascinates me so. i know you stole my key," she explained.
steve stared at her with a look of shock on his face. he was certain that soon he would die a rather gruesome death. and indeed he did. soon, he was lying on the floor with a staple remover through his neck.
his body, much like the others, was stored in the file cabinet just to the right of wanda's desk. she locked the drawer and went back to working. she also put a vase of flowers on top of the stacks.
FASCINATION
went on the wind tunnel tour. it was the 11-foot one in building 227 that mike showed me before. a few weeks ago. it was interesting. the 11x11 tunnel is transonic, and also pressurized. but the coolest part about it was the engine for the fan, which is like 65,000 horsepower. it uses 6 times as much power as the entire city of palo alto when it's running. wow. (when it was built in the 1950s, it used more power than the entire peninsula from south city to gilroy. dude.)
no wonder we're having an energy crisis with this kind of thing around.
went on the wind tunnel tour. it was the 11-foot one in building 227 that mike showed me before. a few weeks ago. it was interesting. the 11x11 tunnel is transonic, and also pressurized. but the coolest part about it was the engine for the fan, which is like 65,000 horsepower. it uses 6 times as much power as the entire city of palo alto when it's running. wow. (when it was built in the 1950s, it used more power than the entire peninsula from south city to gilroy. dude.)
no wonder we're having an energy crisis with this kind of thing around.
MORE THINGS TO DO
i still have to finish making the database of my cd collection. i started last summer and got through about half, but that's now about a third. so.
i should stop using techwipes as tissues. but there needs to be a box of kleenex in the room! dammit.
i have to clean off my desk by friday. because i am leaving on friday.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i still have to finish making the database of my cd collection. i started last summer and got through about half, but that's now about a third. so.
i should stop using techwipes as tissues. but there needs to be a box of kleenex in the room! dammit.
i have to clean off my desk by friday. because i am leaving on friday.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
EUREKA
thanks, byte.
now why don't you learn your own friggin' math?
that is what i needed. except when he told me what he needed, he told me wrongly, and i was looking for something else entirely. this would have made my life so much simpler.
yes it suuuure would have.
but really, it is a much better idea for a space system than using forked tasks. if i were a programmer, i'd make mine that same way. using nice math. who cares where something is unless you're observing it?
when i was thinking about learning to program and then making a system like this, it's how i imagined it would work. because i haaate forked tasks and stuff like that. they're ugly.
thanks, byte.
now why don't you learn your own friggin' math?
that is what i needed. except when he told me what he needed, he told me wrongly, and i was looking for something else entirely. this would have made my life so much simpler.
yes it suuuure would have.
but really, it is a much better idea for a space system than using forked tasks. if i were a programmer, i'd make mine that same way. using nice math. who cares where something is unless you're observing it?
when i was thinking about learning to program and then making a system like this, it's how i imagined it would work. because i haaate forked tasks and stuff like that. they're ugly.
I HAVE RECOGNITION
joy is writing an article about me in the code a newsletter.
!!!
i have never been in the media before. in middle school, i had three letters to the editor published, but only because no one else ever wrote letters to the editor. last year i was mentioned by name once in the paper and they spelled it wrong. i also got quoted, but not by name, in another article. meanwhile my dad is quoted or mentioned at least twice in every issue.
bah. anyway.
yesterday karin came back from photography and decided she was going to start using human subjects, me being her first victim. she got another shot of my hand. i told her to go photograph some inanimate objects, as there are about a billion of them that are more photogenic than i am. especially better looking than the side of my head, the right side, which is tem times uglier than the left side. i also told her that if she developed that shot, i would be very annoyed. she grinned and laughed and took another picture. but isn't that what siblings are for?
going on a wind tunnel tour this afternoon at 1:30. this means i will miss the chat with jonny greenwood. i will tell alex to ask a question for me maybe.
i have to pack tonight. i'll have no time tomorrow or the next day.
joy is writing an article about me in the code a newsletter.
!!!
i have never been in the media before. in middle school, i had three letters to the editor published, but only because no one else ever wrote letters to the editor. last year i was mentioned by name once in the paper and they spelled it wrong. i also got quoted, but not by name, in another article. meanwhile my dad is quoted or mentioned at least twice in every issue.
bah. anyway.
yesterday karin came back from photography and decided she was going to start using human subjects, me being her first victim. she got another shot of my hand. i told her to go photograph some inanimate objects, as there are about a billion of them that are more photogenic than i am. especially better looking than the side of my head, the right side, which is tem times uglier than the left side. i also told her that if she developed that shot, i would be very annoyed. she grinned and laughed and took another picture. but isn't that what siblings are for?
going on a wind tunnel tour this afternoon at 1:30. this means i will miss the chat with jonny greenwood. i will tell alex to ask a question for me maybe.
i have to pack tonight. i'll have no time tomorrow or the next day.
OH BOY
what a weird argument
i hope not to many people think this is what i stand for.
who says car companies suck?
would take care of califonia's energy crisis?
this is sad
no comment.
what a weird argument
i hope not to many people think this is what i stand for.
who says car companies suck?
would take care of califonia's energy crisis?
this is sad
no comment.
tiistai, elokuu 7
THIS IS SAD
areas are very polluted
light pollution sucks. but i still find it ironic that pasadena, of all places, has limits on what types of lights can be used at night and is very strict with using sodium vapor street lamps. pasadena, where you can't see ten feet in front of you due to smog, but they have laws made to reduce light pollution. anyway, no parents, i don't want to go to caltech. there is too much fucking smog, and it's too much like los angeles, without the gritty parts that i like. and i'd need a car.
editorial on scientific objectivity
areas are very polluted
light pollution sucks. but i still find it ironic that pasadena, of all places, has limits on what types of lights can be used at night and is very strict with using sodium vapor street lamps. pasadena, where you can't see ten feet in front of you due to smog, but they have laws made to reduce light pollution. anyway, no parents, i don't want to go to caltech. there is too much fucking smog, and it's too much like los angeles, without the gritty parts that i like. and i'd need a car.
editorial on scientific objectivity
IF I HAD A BILLION $
here is a short story:
once upon a time there was a guy named bob. he lived in an apartment that overlooked a park, but he could hardly tell it was a park from his floor. from the 520th story, it just looked like a patch of lichen on the faraway ground.
well, bob had a neighbor, susie. (her parents, mr. and mrs. mee thought it would be funny to name their daughter susan and hoped she'd go by sue, but this never worked out. she legally changed her name when she became an adult so that she would not become a target of lawsuits.) bob was in love with susie. he would watch he sit on her balcony every day. he thought she was the greatest thing since double-a batteries. she would step outside her double-paned sliding door and look over the edge without faltering, something that bob could never do. when he looked over his balcony railing, he felt faint. he also thought susie's oxygen mask was sexy.
one day bob wrote a poem about his love:
susie was offended because she thought bob resembled a piece of roadkill. the next day when she saw him watching her, she beckoned him to come out on his balcony. when he was out, she sat on her railing and motioned for him to do the same. carefully, bob did the same.
"you are like a delicate maraschino cherry atop a colony of army ants," bob called to her.
"fuck you!" said susie.
bob fell to his death. it took 18.62 seconds for him to reach the bottom. where he landed, there was a small crater in which water would gather when it rained and pigeons from the nearby park would bathe. it caused many accidents, and soon came to be known as "bob's pothole". meanwhile, bob's apartment was rented out to some college students who painted the walls black.
here is a short story:
once upon a time there was a guy named bob. he lived in an apartment that overlooked a park, but he could hardly tell it was a park from his floor. from the 520th story, it just looked like a patch of lichen on the faraway ground.
well, bob had a neighbor, susie. (her parents, mr. and mrs. mee thought it would be funny to name their daughter susan and hoped she'd go by sue, but this never worked out. she legally changed her name when she became an adult so that she would not become a target of lawsuits.) bob was in love with susie. he would watch he sit on her balcony every day. he thought she was the greatest thing since double-a batteries. she would step outside her double-paned sliding door and look over the edge without faltering, something that bob could never do. when he looked over his balcony railing, he felt faint. he also thought susie's oxygen mask was sexy.
one day bob wrote a poem about his love:
whenever i see you standing thereand put it in her mailbox.
my dear sweet susie,
i think about your striking beauty
it makes me woozy.
susie was offended because she thought bob resembled a piece of roadkill. the next day when she saw him watching her, she beckoned him to come out on his balcony. when he was out, she sat on her railing and motioned for him to do the same. carefully, bob did the same.
"you are like a delicate maraschino cherry atop a colony of army ants," bob called to her.
"fuck you!" said susie.
bob fell to his death. it took 18.62 seconds for him to reach the bottom. where he landed, there was a small crater in which water would gather when it rained and pigeons from the nearby park would bathe. it caused many accidents, and soon came to be known as "bob's pothole". meanwhile, bob's apartment was rented out to some college students who painted the walls black.
I STOLE THIS SURVEY FROM DAN
it is pathetic. but i'm bored. i just finished my paper on the cubes and have nothing to do.
it is pathetic. but i'm bored. i just finished my paper on the cubes and have nothing to do.
- What were you doing before you got on the computer? taking the train to get to work, sitting down, turning it on.
- What are you eating/drinking at the moment? coke. and a nectarine.
- Who do you hate more, mom or dad? i like my parents.
- Which one sucks the most, rap or country? country. i hate it. with a passion.
- Are you good at math? no, but people think i am. and they're wrong. i wish i had mad math skillz.
- Do you like meatloaf? i hate the word 'meatloaf'. and the food is bad.
- Do you like the red stuff they put on meatloaf? no.
- Who do you want to murder from school? i am a nonviolent person. usually. i don't want to murder anyone, just banish them from my 10-mile radius. let me think..probably anatoly, because he annoys me to death, and last year i would've said dario. ooh, and alisa. i'd better stop now.
- Have you ever had any homosexual experiences? have i ever had any experiences? no. but i've thought about it. i consider myself straight, but i do think some girls are hot.
- What's the most trouble you've ever gotten into? i don't get into trouble. i just get yelled at.
- Aren't Jewish people cool? everyone is cool. just some people bug me sometimes.
- Do you paint your nails? yeah. when i'm bored. but only red or black.
- Who is *really* dead, God or Neitzche? well, neitzche was a living dude once, and he's not anymore, thusly he must be dead. i dunno about god.
- Isn't Neitzche cool? his name rocks.
- Isn't Freud weird and completely WRONG? his ideas are weird. but they're not necessarily wrong.
- Doesn't blonde hair suck? it looks ugly on me.
- What do you think you'll be doing in ten years? probably i'll still be in graduate school trying to complete a thesis.
- Is your online personality the same as your RL one? occasionally.
- Headphones or speakers? depends on how good the headphones fit my head. if they're uncomfortable and give me a headache, then speakers.
- Did your headphones save your life? they'd be more likely to kill me, while i'm crossing the street and then a car hits me.
- When you eat skittles, does your mouth start to feel funny after awhile? uh-huh.
- Doesn't TV mostly suck except for the not-suck things? a lot of it's mediochre or bad, but then there's good stuff that i watch.
- Aren't female hands pretty? yes, but not mine. my feet are worse, though.
- Have you ever tried to make up your own secret language? several times. one was put to a lot of use on the playground in lower school.
- Do you like going to sleep late, waking up late, and doing nothing in between? of course, who doesn't? but that's the opposite of what i've done all summer.
- Isn't the ocean scary? what damn fool write this survey? the ocean rocks. the beaches here in sf are gross or dangerous, though. the bay is scary and polluted but pretty from a distance.
- Don't you hate it when your mom looks over your shoulder while you're online? no, i hate it when my nosy little sister does that. especially when...er...never mind.
- Don't you hate it when people stereotype all fourteen-year-old girls to be preppy, rabid N'sync fans? i have a 14-year-old sister who isn't. but kids these days...
- Which is worse- bleeding to death from your wrists, or being forced to listen to Limp Bizkit for 24 hours straight? limp bizkit is ugly-sounding. slitting your wrists is a bad idea. um. prolly the latter.
- Do you believe in extraterrestrials? hell yeah. there would otherwise be no point in me aspiring to be an astrobiologist.
- Ghosts? i dunno.
- God? not really.
- Love? love is good.
- Everything they say in the bible? not everything. i'm not religious, but they have some good ideas. and some bad ones.
- Isn't "Jesus" a funny word? depends on how you say it [meredith!]
- Which sucks more- stereotypical cowboys and the west, or stereotypical Italian people and the Mafia? the mafia. mafia movies bore me. then again, so do westerns. [my dad is a western fanatic.]
- Which sucks more- an unoriginal sitcom about two wacky lovable sisters and their moody grandfather and dog Spanky, or an unoriginal action movie about how some buff hero must save his sexy co-star from an evil kidnapper, having to "break all the rules" in the process? the sitcom, because it takes up valuable tv time.
- When you first heard of The Matrix, did you immediately think of a Mafia film? no, i immediately thought about math and how much it sucks sometimes.
- Doesn't Mulder suck? no, but david duchovny does. as a person. he's a good actor, but he ruined x-files. but mulder is in ~*~lUrVe~*~ with scully.
- What's your earliest childhood memory? when my sister was born. i was 2.5 or so. gloria was taking care of me for a bit. when my mom was in labor, my dad took me to ride a cable car. it was my first time. then we brought my mom some ice cream in bed.
- Isn't this an original survey? it's odd. the questions would be thrown out as leading questions by any judge.
- Don't you hate how surveys keep asking the same dang questions over and over? i suuuuure do.
- Who is more annoying- Martin Short or Carrot Top? carrot top. he was especially annoying on the list [the vh1 show].
PLANS
i have major plans for myself over the next few weeks. they mostly have to do with spending money, because that's what i have.
to do
i have major plans for myself over the next few weeks. they mostly have to do with spending money, because that's what i have.
to do
- buy necessary stuff
- a sweater that is not black
- sox
- underwear
- some long-sleeved shirts that are not black
- this pair of straight-leg loose jeans to replace the ones i have that are wearing out
- last year's birthday present for meredith
- a sweater that is not black
- shop for frivolous items
- some black lace-up boots. (i deem this necessary, because they go with everything, but my mom says i have too many shoes. which is true.)
- something to hide my bureau, which still looks like something out of a movie.
- some cds
- sheryl crow
- radiohead "knives out" single
- new muse record
- travis, _the invisible band_
- gorillaz
- new cake
- etc.
- sheryl crow
- a better calculator (i want a ti-89, yes i do.)
- some black lace-up boots. (i deem this necessary, because they go with everything, but my mom says i have too many shoes. which is true.)
- back to school shit
- notebooks
- textbooks (remind me to get my ass over to berkeley before august 27)
- a locker shelf. i will be organized this year.
- notebooks
- go do service hours until xi is pleased
- see stereophonics at fillmore on september 8. i don't want to miss them for the fourth time.
- get driver's permit
- clean out my hard disk
- etc.
LIFE IS GRATE, LIKE CHEESE
only a few more days left. and i am elated.
except that right before i leave, they decide that i've left too much email on the mail server, and so all my inbox has been deleted. this is frustrating!! to an extreme!! i am supposed to tour a wind tunnel tomorrow but i've lost the location of it. i will ask someone.
last night i watched _the pledge_ with jack nicholson. it was rather gruesome at the beginning, but it's an interesting movie. evidently none of the places are real towns/counties in nevada, but most people wouldn't know. including me. i just looked it up. looking forward to the beginning of the fall tv season and the return of crime scene investigators. that is a good show. i enjoy it thoroughly.
lately i have begun to sleep with gloves on again. it helps me fall asleep better. i leave myself alone that way, or at least i'm inclined to. the problem is that in the morning, my hands get really hot for some reason. maybe i should find some that are less thick. the ones i'm using are thick and fleecy and not good for summer weather.
or at least i'm an optimist and think the weather here will be warmer someday this summer. i quote:
i am still tweaking this template. i think i need a graphic that includes the name, as the text thing isn't working very well. it looks better in netscape than explorer.
only a few more days left. and i am elated.
except that right before i leave, they decide that i've left too much email on the mail server, and so all my inbox has been deleted. this is frustrating!! to an extreme!! i am supposed to tour a wind tunnel tomorrow but i've lost the location of it. i will ask someone.
last night i watched _the pledge_ with jack nicholson. it was rather gruesome at the beginning, but it's an interesting movie. evidently none of the places are real towns/counties in nevada, but most people wouldn't know. including me. i just looked it up. looking forward to the beginning of the fall tv season and the return of crime scene investigators. that is a good show. i enjoy it thoroughly.
lately i have begun to sleep with gloves on again. it helps me fall asleep better. i leave myself alone that way, or at least i'm inclined to. the problem is that in the morning, my hands get really hot for some reason. maybe i should find some that are less thick. the ones i'm using are thick and fleecy and not good for summer weather.
or at least i'm an optimist and think the weather here will be warmer someday this summer. i quote:
"the coldest winter i ever spent was a summer in san francisco."which of course is cited nonstop by the residents. may is nice. august is usually pretty good, and september and october we get nice weather, but june and july are foggy and damp and cold during the day. the only good side of this is that when it's cool in san francisco, the weather in mountain view is bearable. when it's warm, the temperature here is much like hell, i imagine.
-mark twain
i am still tweaking this template. i think i need a graphic that includes the name, as the text thing isn't working very well. it looks better in netscape than explorer.
maanantai, elokuu 6
IASSOC WITH MY CAT
we put this anti-flea stuff on weenie and now he is licking himself compulsively. hopefully he won't turn into cocoa, who has a pretty bad case of trichtillomania. poor cat was nervous as hell. she hated us.
i am still working on the problem with the spacecraft trajectory and the sphere. I have the directed distance formula for a plane, and how to find the distance from a point to a plane, but not how to get the distance between a point and a line in space. i don't even remember the parametric form of lines. god help me. mr. chambers probably said it would come in handy someday, and did i listen? if i remember and i tell him, maybe he'll change my grade. but prolly not.
we put this anti-flea stuff on weenie and now he is licking himself compulsively. hopefully he won't turn into cocoa, who has a pretty bad case of trichtillomania. poor cat was nervous as hell. she hated us.
i am still working on the problem with the spacecraft trajectory and the sphere. I have the directed distance formula for a plane, and how to find the distance from a point to a plane, but not how to get the distance between a point and a line in space. i don't even remember the parametric form of lines. god help me. mr. chambers probably said it would come in handy someday, and did i listen? if i remember and i tell him, maybe he'll change my grade. but prolly not.
MAYBE I SHOULD LEARN
the ftp server is being screwy. i hope my archives went through.
about half an hour ago bytenik asked me if i would help him with his space system. that made me laugh. everyone always wants to make space systems and then they don't know/remember the slightest thing about the math. yet they are perfectly competent programmers. even though he is a rude bastard, i agreed to help him. then as soon as i logged on, the hybrid-moo server went down. so it sucked.
here, i am going to write a short story.
once upon a time there was a chemolithotrophic bacterium named otto. he had a lot of microbial pals. they all lived at the bottom of a deep sea vent where the weather was always rather warm.
one day, otto said to his chum fred, "let us go for a stroll on this fine day." fred agreed. they walked through the park and came across some hydrogen sulfide. they ate it and it was good. pretty soon, though, they saw a warning sign beside the path that said "beware of the heterotrophs!" being the small, insignificant and somewhat stupid organisms that they were, they did not heed its warning and continued. rather quickly, fred and otto were gobbled by a plankton, zooey.
zooey laughed and licked her chops after the delicious meal of monerans. she then swam off to join her herd. a few days later, after a very short life, they too were eaten by a fish. and a whale eventually ate the fish and then japan said the whales were getting too fat from the fish and so the whale died an untimely death caught in a net.
there is no moral to this story. but wasn't it educational?
the ftp server is being screwy. i hope my archives went through.
about half an hour ago bytenik asked me if i would help him with his space system. that made me laugh. everyone always wants to make space systems and then they don't know/remember the slightest thing about the math. yet they are perfectly competent programmers. even though he is a rude bastard, i agreed to help him. then as soon as i logged on, the hybrid-moo server went down. so it sucked.
here, i am going to write a short story.
once upon a time there was a chemolithotrophic bacterium named otto. he had a lot of microbial pals. they all lived at the bottom of a deep sea vent where the weather was always rather warm.
one day, otto said to his chum fred, "let us go for a stroll on this fine day." fred agreed. they walked through the park and came across some hydrogen sulfide. they ate it and it was good. pretty soon, though, they saw a warning sign beside the path that said "beware of the heterotrophs!" being the small, insignificant and somewhat stupid organisms that they were, they did not heed its warning and continued. rather quickly, fred and otto were gobbled by a plankton, zooey.
zooey laughed and licked her chops after the delicious meal of monerans. she then swam off to join her herd. a few days later, after a very short life, they too were eaten by a fish. and a whale eventually ate the fish and then japan said the whales were getting too fat from the fish and so the whale died an untimely death caught in a net.
there is no moral to this story. but wasn't it educational?
HUH
blogger's ad policy makes me want to jump for joy.
just visited the old chickclick boards. they now have ads beside the threads and interspersed throughout the posts. it's pretty awful.
blogger's ad policy makes me want to jump for joy.
just visited the old chickclick boards. they now have ads beside the threads and interspersed throughout the posts. it's pretty awful.
QUE MISTERIA
at cyanchat over the weekend, they had un-mysterium. that is, a convention for the people who weren't going to mysterium. of course, mysterium is a real-life convention for myst fans who are generally online. so what is the point of having a convention online if everyone already does that daily?
maybe sometime i'll drag myself to mysterium. my issue being the lack of driving ability/car, no one to go with, and that i'm only involved with a satellite community now and i'd hardly know anyone unless people from writers of d'ni are going. and i don't think there's many. perhaps next year i could organize something so that people i know go and stuff. that'd be very kewliezzz.
at cyanchat over the weekend, they had un-mysterium. that is, a convention for the people who weren't going to mysterium. of course, mysterium is a real-life convention for myst fans who are generally online. so what is the point of having a convention online if everyone already does that daily?
maybe sometime i'll drag myself to mysterium. my issue being the lack of driving ability/car, no one to go with, and that i'm only involved with a satellite community now and i'd hardly know anyone unless people from writers of d'ni are going. and i don't think there's many. perhaps next year i could organize something so that people i know go and stuff. that'd be very kewliezzz.
ENTERING...
my last week here at ames! joy to the world!
just turned in my report abstract. now all i have to do is edit my report so it doesn't sound so ugly. i really need to learn to write properly. all my essays sound like scientific papers except the ones that are supposed to be like that, in which case they sound like literary analyses.
my problem: i just found out that i start school at lowell and at berkeley on the same day. this is news to me. (i had to find out from karin's "welcome to lowell!" letter that she just received.) this is also just after i replied to xi's email very nicely telling her sure, i'll do the extra service hours. then i had to send her another one that said i couldn't stay for all of self-scheduling because i have class. yes xi, i have class. hopefully she won't make me resign from shield and scroll, because god only knows i had enough trouble making myself apply to get in, and now that i'm in i don't want to have to quit, especially after doing all my service.
making plans to see american pie 2 with andrea on friday, ghost world with sarah sometime else this week.
my last week here at ames! joy to the world!
just turned in my report abstract. now all i have to do is edit my report so it doesn't sound so ugly. i really need to learn to write properly. all my essays sound like scientific papers except the ones that are supposed to be like that, in which case they sound like literary analyses.
my problem: i just found out that i start school at lowell and at berkeley on the same day. this is news to me. (i had to find out from karin's "welcome to lowell!" letter that she just received.) this is also just after i replied to xi's email very nicely telling her sure, i'll do the extra service hours. then i had to send her another one that said i couldn't stay for all of self-scheduling because i have class. yes xi, i have class. hopefully she won't make me resign from shield and scroll, because god only knows i had enough trouble making myself apply to get in, and now that i'm in i don't want to have to quit, especially after doing all my service.
making plans to see american pie 2 with andrea on friday, ghost world with sarah sometime else this week.
sunnuntai, elokuu 5
I KNOW WHAT I WANT AND IT'S SEXAY
- a place in the sun
- the far side to have more strips
- the power to disoney laws of nature at will
- a hot glue gun
- my player's wardrobe to magically be updated. and my age to build itself. and stuff.
- a warm body
- these pains in my shin to stop
- a better radio station
- watermelon chewy jolly ranchers
- a life
SEE POST. SEE POST RUN. RUN POST RUN.
so i went to my un-sucky job today and it was still a lot of fun. compared to nasa. but i will venture no further into that realm of complaints. however: dar has been telling me since last summer that i should do discovery walks. and then she only puts them on saturdays, which i haven't worked since i started. and she has allowed new people to do them which i wasn't allowed to do when i was new and would have been able to do them on the right day! argh.
i just found out that molly is still working. i thought she got fired last year for being a bitch to the bosses, but evidently she's back. there's something about her that i never liked, even though she's always nice to me. is this bad? i've never had such cold evil thoughts about someone who is nice to me.
so i walked around and i had a good day talking to people. maybe i'm not the lab type. maybe i should become the type of scientist who doesn't just do research but actually teaches in a classroom. i like talking to people and showing them stuff. but i don't want to do that all the time.
random note of uninterest: i got the vibrating plates to work! yay!
some qooc's:
i am talking to harold over aim. he is not going to be working in the fall. thusly, i am going to have to deal with stupid newbie pricks and i need moral support from other old people. everyone is leaving for college or whatever! like chuck, david m, aaron p, jamal, adriana, amy, etc. i need these people to keep me in my place. as well as other people. hopefully not all the other people who are also seniors will leave because they have no time or whatever. i need friends.
damn.
(Public) Fwongo, The Spawn Of Satan And Bringer Of Endless Misery To All Mortals grins.
(Public) Murray: Ha! I have seen bigger spawns of Satan then you!
that reminds me of this time on a wednesday night when there was practically no one in the museum, so i was hanging out in the lounge with people. evan was there, even though he quit last summer. he was making me play draw with him, the game where you draw random things and see who can come up with the most random, wacky idea. ours was following a storyline, though, so it wasn't really random. i had a tap-dancing trout with fleas and then the fleas were paid a visit by a spork and stuff, and pretty soon we had hell, hell 2 (where satan's landlord lives), the psychic-psychic policeman (who can see things before they are thought of by other psychics) and then the universe blew up due to inconsistencies and we were back to little johnny, who bought an ice cream cone.
yeah.
i am going to take some pictures of my favorite exhibits and post them.
so i went to my un-sucky job today and it was still a lot of fun. compared to nasa. but i will venture no further into that realm of complaints. however: dar has been telling me since last summer that i should do discovery walks. and then she only puts them on saturdays, which i haven't worked since i started. and she has allowed new people to do them which i wasn't allowed to do when i was new and would have been able to do them on the right day! argh.
i just found out that molly is still working. i thought she got fired last year for being a bitch to the bosses, but evidently she's back. there's something about her that i never liked, even though she's always nice to me. is this bad? i've never had such cold evil thoughts about someone who is nice to me.
so i walked around and i had a good day talking to people. maybe i'm not the lab type. maybe i should become the type of scientist who doesn't just do research but actually teaches in a classroom. i like talking to people and showing them stuff. but i don't want to do that all the time.
random note of uninterest: i got the vibrating plates to work! yay!
some qooc's:
shawn: this chair doesn't go up.
jay: you don't go up.
jay (a moment later): i meant that to be an idle insult, but i didn't mean it like that.
mori: can any girls here do that thing where you catch coins in your cleavage?
adriana (from the other side of the room, talking to someone else): and i caught it on my shirt.
me: my cleavage is minimal.
i am talking to harold over aim. he is not going to be working in the fall. thusly, i am going to have to deal with stupid newbie pricks and i need moral support from other old people. everyone is leaving for college or whatever! like chuck, david m, aaron p, jamal, adriana, amy, etc. i need these people to keep me in my place. as well as other people. hopefully not all the other people who are also seniors will leave because they have no time or whatever. i need friends.
damn.
(Public) Fwongo, The Spawn Of Satan And Bringer Of Endless Misery To All Mortals grins.
(Public) Murray: Ha! I have seen bigger spawns of Satan then you!
that reminds me of this time on a wednesday night when there was practically no one in the museum, so i was hanging out in the lounge with people. evan was there, even though he quit last summer. he was making me play draw with him, the game where you draw random things and see who can come up with the most random, wacky idea. ours was following a storyline, though, so it wasn't really random. i had a tap-dancing trout with fleas and then the fleas were paid a visit by a spork and stuff, and pretty soon we had hell, hell 2 (where satan's landlord lives), the psychic-psychic policeman (who can see things before they are thought of by other psychics) and then the universe blew up due to inconsistencies and we were back to little johnny, who bought an ice cream cone.
yeah.
i am going to take some pictures of my favorite exhibits and post them.
lauantai, elokuu 4
A SURVEY I STOLE
from sophy
i'm bored to death.
Section One: My thoughts on...
Abortion
sure, but using birth control is better
God
not as an omniscient old man or a being. i dunno. i don't like the idea of a god.
Sex
yes please.
Love
love is all i need.
Section Two: What Would I Do If...
My Dog Died
my dog already died. several years ago. it was about time. if my cat died, i'd be very sad.
If my internet connection got cut off forever
this is a joke, right?
If I only had 10 hours left to live
i'd say goodbye and go to sleep.
If my best friend died because of me
guilt. depression. issues.
Section Three: Have you ever...
Done hard drugs?
what is 'hard'?
Been in love?
maybe. probably. i fell in love with some shoes, too.
Had sex?
no. i'm like a virgin.
Made love?
see above.
Been arrested?
no, but i did some illegal shit.
Attempted to commit suicide
yes, unfortunately.
Been in an abusive relationship and gotten out
no.
Cut yourself to see how much it'll bleed?
yeah.
Section Four: When was the last time you...
Had a long cry
a very long time. but i've had some long wallow-in-self-pity sessions recently.
Had sex/Made Love
see section 3.
Bought something?
well. i bought an august fast pass recently.
Read a book?
earlier this morning.
Kissed someone
beats me.
Told someone you loved them
i am stingy with this expression. okay, i love everyone.
Wrote a long letter
a very long time ago. i don't write letters. i write email.
Got mad
i had a temper tantrum today after cleaning too much. :)
Cut yourself shaving
last week.
from sophy
i'm bored to death.
Section One: My thoughts on...
Abortion
sure, but using birth control is better
God
not as an omniscient old man or a being. i dunno. i don't like the idea of a god.
Sex
yes please.
Love
love is all i need.
Section Two: What Would I Do If...
My Dog Died
my dog already died. several years ago. it was about time. if my cat died, i'd be very sad.
If my internet connection got cut off forever
this is a joke, right?
If I only had 10 hours left to live
i'd say goodbye and go to sleep.
If my best friend died because of me
guilt. depression. issues.
Section Three: Have you ever...
Done hard drugs?
what is 'hard'?
Been in love?
maybe. probably. i fell in love with some shoes, too.
Had sex?
no. i'm like a virgin.
Made love?
see above.
Been arrested?
no, but i did some illegal shit.
Attempted to commit suicide
yes, unfortunately.
Been in an abusive relationship and gotten out
no.
Cut yourself to see how much it'll bleed?
yeah.
Section Four: When was the last time you...
Had a long cry
a very long time. but i've had some long wallow-in-self-pity sessions recently.
Had sex/Made Love
see section 3.
Bought something?
well. i bought an august fast pass recently.
Read a book?
earlier this morning.
Kissed someone
beats me.
Told someone you loved them
i am stingy with this expression. okay, i love everyone.
Wrote a long letter
a very long time ago. i don't write letters. i write email.
Got mad
i had a temper tantrum today after cleaning too much. :)
Cut yourself shaving
last week.
A PHILOSOPHICAL DISCISSION ABOUT LOVE
(Public) Kat: Why does Jen want to strangle me? :)
(Public) Dan:)
(Public) Tigger chuckles.
(Public) Jesus: I sure hope that she comes here and screws me sometime, so that all the time doesn't go to waste.
(Public) Jesus nods.
(Public) Dan hms.
(Public) Jesus: I'm talking about the Alberta chick, Kat.
(Public) Tigger chortles, "I'd pray."
(Public) Jesus: She's annoying.
(Public) Jesus: If you payed attention to what I was talking about.
(Public) Jesus: I started off with the point "I think this chatting with the Alberta chick thing has gotta stop."
(Public) Fwongo: Turn into /her/ stalker. Turn into such a creep she alienates herself from you.
(Public) Jesus: That's mean.
(Public) Fwongo: So?
(Public) Jesus: I'd just block her.
(Public) Kat: Well yes. But I'm self-centered.
(Public) Fwongo: Noo, don't leave her in emotional isolation
(Public) Jesus: That is much more civilized.
(Public) Kat: Girls like closure.
(Public) Jesus: Hm.
(Public) Jesus: Really?
(Public) Fwongo: Better to leave her with a "good fucking riddance" feeling than just cutting all contact off suddenly.
(Public) Fwongo: Yeah, they do.
(Public) Kat: I am so not kidding.
(Public) Kat: She would probably wonder about it for years if you blocked her.
(Public) Kat: And then she'd become a goth if she isn't already, and write poetry on her arm.
(Public) Jesus laughs.
(Public) Fwongo: By turning into a creep you boost her ego by making her the initiator of the loss of contact.
(Public) Fwongo: And avoid emotional pain on her side.
(Public) Fwongo: Civilized my arse, we're talking tactics.
(Public) Jesus: Well thank you, Dr. Alex
(Public) Fwongo: Take it from Kat if you have to.
(Public) Kat: Yeah. I'd rather a guy turn into a creep than suddenly cut off contact for no reason.
(Public) Jesus: I'll do this than, "I'm sorry Andrea. I have grown tired of talking to you. If you would still like to have sex with me, call me when you get here. Have a motel ready. Otherwise, goodbye, and good riddance."
(Public) Fwongo: Better than just ignoring her, but not good enough.
(Public) Fwongo: Do what I and Kat said, make her initiate the "beakup".
(Public) Fwongo: It'll take like 2 days at most if you make a sincere attempt to piss her off.
(Public) Jesus: Yeah, but I like her.
(Public) Jesus: She's just a moron.
(Kleenex) Dan: Fwongo has no idea what he's talking about, I'm starting to assume.
(Kleenex) Kat: Oh yes.
(Public) Jesus: I just want to find a way to stop talking to her but keep the door open.
(Kleenex) Kat: Neither does Jen. ;)
(Public) Ahron: I hate it when that happens
(Public) Jesus: Understand?
(Kleenex) Dan grins.
(Public) Ahron: People you like end up being morons... *sigh*
(Public) Kat: That has happened to me.
(Public) Ahron nods.
(Public) Fwongo: That's certainly not how you put it, but yes.
(Public) Ahron: There was this one girl I liked, she wasn't exactly a moron, but she radiated this blonde naivity or something... a moron is some ways, but not in others.
(Public) Fwongo: I revoke what I said now.
(Public) Ahron: She's one of the best piano players I've seen.
Public) Fwongo: Obviously I'm not an expert, but this is my view on human relations in general, and you are all probably starting to assume I have no idea what I'm talking about all the time based on this, but I never said take it as canon. It's just the advice of a deranged, hobbit-like 13-year-old.
(Public) Ahron just fell out of his chair.
i need a life.
(Public) Kat: Why does Jen want to strangle me? :)
(Public) Dan:)
(Public) Tigger chuckles.
(Public) Jesus: I sure hope that she comes here and screws me sometime, so that all the time doesn't go to waste.
(Public) Jesus nods.
(Public) Dan hms.
(Public) Jesus: I'm talking about the Alberta chick, Kat.
(Public) Tigger chortles, "I'd pray."
(Public) Jesus: She's annoying.
(Public) Jesus: If you payed attention to what I was talking about.
(Public) Jesus: I started off with the point "I think this chatting with the Alberta chick thing has gotta stop."
(Public) Fwongo: Turn into /her/ stalker. Turn into such a creep she alienates herself from you.
(Public) Jesus: That's mean.
(Public) Fwongo: So?
(Public) Jesus: I'd just block her.
(Public) Kat: Well yes. But I'm self-centered.
(Public) Fwongo: Noo, don't leave her in emotional isolation
(Public) Jesus: That is much more civilized.
(Public) Kat: Girls like closure.
(Public) Jesus: Hm.
(Public) Jesus: Really?
(Public) Fwongo: Better to leave her with a "good fucking riddance" feeling than just cutting all contact off suddenly.
(Public) Fwongo: Yeah, they do.
(Public) Kat: I am so not kidding.
(Public) Kat: She would probably wonder about it for years if you blocked her.
(Public) Kat: And then she'd become a goth if she isn't already, and write poetry on her arm.
(Public) Jesus laughs.
(Public) Fwongo: By turning into a creep you boost her ego by making her the initiator of the loss of contact.
(Public) Fwongo: And avoid emotional pain on her side.
(Public) Fwongo: Civilized my arse, we're talking tactics.
(Public) Jesus: Well thank you, Dr. Alex
(Public) Fwongo: Take it from Kat if you have to.
(Public) Kat: Yeah. I'd rather a guy turn into a creep than suddenly cut off contact for no reason.
(Public) Jesus: I'll do this than, "I'm sorry Andrea. I have grown tired of talking to you. If you would still like to have sex with me, call me when you get here. Have a motel ready. Otherwise, goodbye, and good riddance."
(Public) Fwongo: Better than just ignoring her, but not good enough.
(Public) Fwongo: Do what I and Kat said, make her initiate the "beakup".
(Public) Fwongo: It'll take like 2 days at most if you make a sincere attempt to piss her off.
(Public) Jesus: Yeah, but I like her.
(Public) Jesus: She's just a moron.
(Kleenex) Dan: Fwongo has no idea what he's talking about, I'm starting to assume.
(Kleenex) Kat: Oh yes.
(Public) Jesus: I just want to find a way to stop talking to her but keep the door open.
(Kleenex) Kat: Neither does Jen. ;)
(Public) Ahron: I hate it when that happens
(Public) Jesus: Understand?
(Kleenex) Dan grins.
(Public) Ahron: People you like end up being morons... *sigh*
(Public) Kat: That has happened to me.
(Public) Ahron nods.
(Public) Fwongo: That's certainly not how you put it, but yes.
(Public) Ahron: There was this one girl I liked, she wasn't exactly a moron, but she radiated this blonde naivity or something... a moron is some ways, but not in others.
(Public) Fwongo: I revoke what I said now.
(Public) Ahron: She's one of the best piano players I've seen.
Public) Fwongo: Obviously I'm not an expert, but this is my view on human relations in general, and you are all probably starting to assume I have no idea what I'm talking about all the time based on this, but I never said take it as canon. It's just the advice of a deranged, hobbit-like 13-year-old.
(Public) Ahron just fell out of his chair.
i need a life.
FAMILY TOGETHERNESS
i dislike the way people tend to split up rather than come together. i'm fucking sick of my friends hating each other for stupid reasons.
...
i don't really have any more to say on that right now.
i dislike the way people tend to split up rather than come together. i'm fucking sick of my friends hating each other for stupid reasons.
...
i don't really have any more to say on that right now.
CURRENTNESS
watching: 2001: a space odyssey (for the whateverth time)
listening: the radio
reading: (by coincidence only) collected short stories of arthur c. clarke
surfing: have been surfing all day and found nothing of interest
watching: 2001: a space odyssey (for the whateverth time)
listening: the radio
reading: (by coincidence only) collected short stories of arthur c. clarke
surfing: have been surfing all day and found nothing of interest
LOOKIE
you can see my room here.
right now karin is out with her friends seeing the princess diaries. i am rotting at home.
i just got an email from xi, who says that since there are a lot of people who didn't do their mods for shield and scroll this summer, everyone has to do more mandatory mods. answering the phone at school. well, hate to tell ya, xi, but i completed all my mods and then some at the beginning of the summer. i worked my little butt off doing a book inventory and stuff. meanwhile, i am waiting to hear the url of the s&s site. i'd like to know.
andrea is supposed to come over and pick up her brownie plate...
you can see my room here.
right now karin is out with her friends seeing the princess diaries. i am rotting at home.
i just got an email from xi, who says that since there are a lot of people who didn't do their mods for shield and scroll this summer, everyone has to do more mandatory mods. answering the phone at school. well, hate to tell ya, xi, but i completed all my mods and then some at the beginning of the summer. i worked my little butt off doing a book inventory and stuff. meanwhile, i am waiting to hear the url of the s&s site. i'd like to know.
andrea is supposed to come over and pick up her brownie plate...
THE STORY OF MY ROOM
i just cleaned my room. i hadn't removed anything for the past, say, three years. just let junk settle. basically, i'm a pack rat, and my habitation was a disaster area. some things i found:
but my dresser looks tennybopperish now. it looks like something out of a movie.
i hope carolyn or whoever will stay there while i'm gone will be happy.
i just cleaned my room. i hadn't removed anything for the past, say, three years. just let junk settle. basically, i'm a pack rat, and my habitation was a disaster area. some things i found:
- on my dresser:
- a deflated balloon from several years ago
- two soccer trophies i got in sixth grade
- money
- underwear
- hair ribbons
- my keychains from my my freshman backpack
- a mirror
- a shirt i have been looking for for the past year
- the surface
- a deflated balloon from several years ago
- on my "desk":
- christmas tree needles that i had saved for the past 10 years
- christmas candy i hadn't meant to save
- a pencil i got in second grade from mrs. mosheim's grab bag
- some sand-filled turtles. yes, sarah, the ones that people used to obsess over in sixth grade. katya gave me some for my birthday.
- tree!
- various indescribable things
- christmas tree needles that i had saved for the past 10 years
- on my bookshelf:
- old notebooks
- a million blank address books/organizers that i was given and never made use of
- drawings from long ago
- books i had forgotten about
- the x-files tapes that were missing. season 7.
- action figures.
- old notebooks
but my dresser looks tennybopperish now. it looks like something out of a movie.
i hope carolyn or whoever will stay there while i'm gone will be happy.
THIS IS KEWLIEZZZ
i am going back to school in less than three weeks.
and for once, i'm looking forward to it. i miss people. only a year of high school left, and i guess i'll miss them again at the end of the year.
here's my wonderful little list of classes i'm taking:
lowell
ap english writing
ap calculus bc (kill me now)
ap physics (fun!)
ap economics
berkeley
eps8: the geological record of climate change
journ20: writing for science
and another seminar, but i forget the title
i am going back to school in less than three weeks.
and for once, i'm looking forward to it. i miss people. only a year of high school left, and i guess i'll miss them again at the end of the year.
here's my wonderful little list of classes i'm taking:
lowell
ap english writing
ap calculus bc (kill me now)
ap physics (fun!)
ap economics
berkeley
eps8: the geological record of climate change
journ20: writing for science
and another seminar, but i forget the title
DREEM
two nights ago, i dreamed about the end of the world.
this took place partway in a familiar dreamscape. it was the waterfall area that is supposedly near the presidio tunnel. the other part took place in asmall, sunny town with lawns and an italian restaurant in a cave.
i was in this restaurant, waiting for my parents to arrive. the colors were earthy, but strangely vivid, almost as if this weren't earth but some other planet or age. i looked around for a table, all the time not wanting to be there. i finally found one in an empty room, the sort that looks undeniably mediterranean. there was a fireplace to my left, a large one, and the walls were made of some sort of brown brick and there were tapestries. i asked the waiter what kind of food they served, and he told me something. not caring for whatever it was that he said, i left.
outside, i found a car full of people i knew. either meredith or becca was there, as was tommy, and some random guy. we drove around the town for a while, looking at the gardens. this town had a road going through it that was an entrance. when approaching, there were willows on the left and the town on the right, and the crossroad ahead led to the aforementioned waterfall. at one point, we stopped, and a sickening feeling came over me. it was the end of the world. the car woudl burn up. "get out," i shouted, and the hood burst into orange flames. i started to run, and my feet felt very heavy. my only hope of survival was to hide behind a small wooden house that was across the street. it took me about five minutes to run there. becca had beaten me, but the guys were still in the car. "i have to save them," i was crying, and so i ran back. tommy was sitting on the back of the car as if he couldn't move, so i grabbed him by the hand and dragged him back to the house where my friend waited in the sunflower patch. the sky was turning yellow.
last night i had a very different dream. i had just moved into a dorm. my room was very small and i was showing my closet to someone.
i went out into the hallway looking for the r.a. who lived down the hall. when i found his room, i asked him if he had a website. he said yeah, but i was supposed to be downstairs having breakfast. when i got there, i found that it was some sort of initiation for freshmen. one in which i was to partake. a girl told me to get in line for breakfast, and i looked at the table. evidently, all we could eat was german pastries and other rather fattening things. at first i was worried about the other students wanting to eat us or something equally macabre. i took a plate and wandered around the table, taking a pastry and some strawberries, which the girl with the plates informed me cost extra. i wandered over to another table, which some parents were running as a healthy alternative to cakes, and took a bagel from someone who revealed herself as mrs. klemeyer. after breakfast, i participated in some sort of relay race that involved antennae. i don't know.
i might as well mention at this point that the dorm resembled a mansion. it had large staircases and hallways with rugs.
two nights ago, i dreamed about the end of the world.
this took place partway in a familiar dreamscape. it was the waterfall area that is supposedly near the presidio tunnel. the other part took place in asmall, sunny town with lawns and an italian restaurant in a cave.
i was in this restaurant, waiting for my parents to arrive. the colors were earthy, but strangely vivid, almost as if this weren't earth but some other planet or age. i looked around for a table, all the time not wanting to be there. i finally found one in an empty room, the sort that looks undeniably mediterranean. there was a fireplace to my left, a large one, and the walls were made of some sort of brown brick and there were tapestries. i asked the waiter what kind of food they served, and he told me something. not caring for whatever it was that he said, i left.
outside, i found a car full of people i knew. either meredith or becca was there, as was tommy, and some random guy. we drove around the town for a while, looking at the gardens. this town had a road going through it that was an entrance. when approaching, there were willows on the left and the town on the right, and the crossroad ahead led to the aforementioned waterfall. at one point, we stopped, and a sickening feeling came over me. it was the end of the world. the car woudl burn up. "get out," i shouted, and the hood burst into orange flames. i started to run, and my feet felt very heavy. my only hope of survival was to hide behind a small wooden house that was across the street. it took me about five minutes to run there. becca had beaten me, but the guys were still in the car. "i have to save them," i was crying, and so i ran back. tommy was sitting on the back of the car as if he couldn't move, so i grabbed him by the hand and dragged him back to the house where my friend waited in the sunflower patch. the sky was turning yellow.
last night i had a very different dream. i had just moved into a dorm. my room was very small and i was showing my closet to someone.
i went out into the hallway looking for the r.a. who lived down the hall. when i found his room, i asked him if he had a website. he said yeah, but i was supposed to be downstairs having breakfast. when i got there, i found that it was some sort of initiation for freshmen. one in which i was to partake. a girl told me to get in line for breakfast, and i looked at the table. evidently, all we could eat was german pastries and other rather fattening things. at first i was worried about the other students wanting to eat us or something equally macabre. i took a plate and wandered around the table, taking a pastry and some strawberries, which the girl with the plates informed me cost extra. i wandered over to another table, which some parents were running as a healthy alternative to cakes, and took a bagel from someone who revealed herself as mrs. klemeyer. after breakfast, i participated in some sort of relay race that involved antennae. i don't know.
i might as well mention at this point that the dorm resembled a mansion. it had large staircases and hallways with rugs.
WOW
i got up early. for a saturday. last night i was falling asleep at 10pm, which just wasn't funny. so i went to bed and then this morning i woke up at 7:30. why does my schedule have to be so...normal?
i found lindsay's website while surfing. i'm just special, right?
i got up early. for a saturday. last night i was falling asleep at 10pm, which just wasn't funny. so i went to bed and then this morning i woke up at 7:30. why does my schedule have to be so...normal?
i found lindsay's website while surfing. i'm just special, right?
perjantai, elokuu 3
GATHER ROUND CHILDREN
well, a few coincidences today reminded me of my pathetic middle school. thus, i shall explicate at length the sad story that my life was. well, it's not actually that sad. but still i shall expect it to incite sympathy in your cold hearts. sympathy for anyone who attends that hellhole.
once upon a time i went to a private girls' school mentioned in my brief biography at the side of this page. that was because my parents didn't like my local public school or something. i did. but that's another story.
well, in kindergarten, i made friends with some people, three of whom i would remain good friends with for a long time. these people were hanna, becca and marie. we were the four musketeers. whatever label you'd like to attach. now, i remained in this happy little group, which also happened to turn into the social outcast group. along about seventh grade, however, marie began to act weird. up until this point, she had always been my best friend, at least according to everyone in my small class of 40 (elitist bitch) people. the reason that she was my best friend, though, was because everyone else saw that there was something a little weird about her.
in seventh grade, though, i began to catch on. around this time, she started to stalk me. she followed me literally everywhere and would call me up at night to check on me. i could not eat lunch alone, nor could i sit in class with other people, nor could i go to the bathroom without her waiting outside the stall. there was nowhere to run and nowhere to hide. (i tried both.) it was beginning to scare me, but the last thing on my list of solutions was to stop being friends with her. why? what inspired me to be so cowardly? you see, marie had a psychotic mother, sue.
sue could have made herself useful. she had a degree in computer science from stanford at a time when that sort of thing was in high demand in my area. but for some reason, she was a housewife to her husband (who was allegedly having an affair with his secretary.) now, she took this out on her daughter, by being overprotective to an extreme. she was protective of her friends as well. when she would drop me off at my house when i was 13, i was not allowed to enter if there was no one home. that is, enter without her waiting inside with me until a parent came home. i could not walk the dog with her daughter in their oversafe neighborhood unless she came along. (i don't think my parents would have sued her if i had scraped me knee or something. no pub intended.) sue spread rumors about hanna and becca when they became less close to marie. i was afraid she'd do the same to me.
well, at the beginning of eighth grade, i had had enough. i told marie no, no more of this. i quit our friendship of eight years. miraculously, it worked without a hitch. of course, it wasn't like i had no friends. i still had becca and hanna, who had supported me through that. however, things had changed between us. the previous year, they had decided it would be nice if we had some other friends. it would be nice if we were more socially acceptable. at that point, i was not into guys, fashion, etc. i had no intention of ever doing so. but that was the kind of thing that one had to do to become accepted. thus, i complied. i tried eating in the cafeteria instead of outside and wearing different clothes on free dress days.
it didn't work. the snobs that were the popular people still disliked me. i was a geek. i used the computer more the the average pre-teen/teenage girl at that time, i dressed badly, my hair was a mess, i had no boyfriend, and worst of all, my parents weren't socialites who lived in pacific heights/sea cliff/st. francis woods. well, enough about them.
becca didn't really like this life either, and by the next year, hanna had had enough of us. she joined the cult of anna and jenn, the blonde mafia. she became a ditz. by the end of the year, i hated everyone except becca, and i wanted to get out of there.
i had the chance to go to high school with hanna and becca. we still considered each other best friends. i decided not to. it was a good choice, because i would have become even more of a reject where they went, plus it would have cost my parents $15k more per year than the free schooling i get now. so.
i'm still friends with becca. she has no friends at her school, or at least ones she considers real. but she's still able to make sardonic comments the same as ever, and is a remarkable person. hanna, according to becca, who was her default best friend for a little bit, broke up with jenn and anna in some fight that everyone in the city heard about, became something of a punk (or something) and is now "hannarexic". that is, she subsists on cheerios and diet coke.
how bizarre.
well, a few coincidences today reminded me of my pathetic middle school. thus, i shall explicate at length the sad story that my life was. well, it's not actually that sad. but still i shall expect it to incite sympathy in your cold hearts. sympathy for anyone who attends that hellhole.
once upon a time i went to a private girls' school mentioned in my brief biography at the side of this page. that was because my parents didn't like my local public school or something. i did. but that's another story.
well, in kindergarten, i made friends with some people, three of whom i would remain good friends with for a long time. these people were hanna, becca and marie. we were the four musketeers. whatever label you'd like to attach. now, i remained in this happy little group, which also happened to turn into the social outcast group. along about seventh grade, however, marie began to act weird. up until this point, she had always been my best friend, at least according to everyone in my small class of 40 (elitist bitch) people. the reason that she was my best friend, though, was because everyone else saw that there was something a little weird about her.
in seventh grade, though, i began to catch on. around this time, she started to stalk me. she followed me literally everywhere and would call me up at night to check on me. i could not eat lunch alone, nor could i sit in class with other people, nor could i go to the bathroom without her waiting outside the stall. there was nowhere to run and nowhere to hide. (i tried both.) it was beginning to scare me, but the last thing on my list of solutions was to stop being friends with her. why? what inspired me to be so cowardly? you see, marie had a psychotic mother, sue.
sue could have made herself useful. she had a degree in computer science from stanford at a time when that sort of thing was in high demand in my area. but for some reason, she was a housewife to her husband (who was allegedly having an affair with his secretary.) now, she took this out on her daughter, by being overprotective to an extreme. she was protective of her friends as well. when she would drop me off at my house when i was 13, i was not allowed to enter if there was no one home. that is, enter without her waiting inside with me until a parent came home. i could not walk the dog with her daughter in their oversafe neighborhood unless she came along. (i don't think my parents would have sued her if i had scraped me knee or something. no pub intended.) sue spread rumors about hanna and becca when they became less close to marie. i was afraid she'd do the same to me.
well, at the beginning of eighth grade, i had had enough. i told marie no, no more of this. i quit our friendship of eight years. miraculously, it worked without a hitch. of course, it wasn't like i had no friends. i still had becca and hanna, who had supported me through that. however, things had changed between us. the previous year, they had decided it would be nice if we had some other friends. it would be nice if we were more socially acceptable. at that point, i was not into guys, fashion, etc. i had no intention of ever doing so. but that was the kind of thing that one had to do to become accepted. thus, i complied. i tried eating in the cafeteria instead of outside and wearing different clothes on free dress days.
it didn't work. the snobs that were the popular people still disliked me. i was a geek. i used the computer more the the average pre-teen/teenage girl at that time, i dressed badly, my hair was a mess, i had no boyfriend, and worst of all, my parents weren't socialites who lived in pacific heights/sea cliff/st. francis woods. well, enough about them.
becca didn't really like this life either, and by the next year, hanna had had enough of us. she joined the cult of anna and jenn, the blonde mafia. she became a ditz. by the end of the year, i hated everyone except becca, and i wanted to get out of there.
i had the chance to go to high school with hanna and becca. we still considered each other best friends. i decided not to. it was a good choice, because i would have become even more of a reject where they went, plus it would have cost my parents $15k more per year than the free schooling i get now. so.
i'm still friends with becca. she has no friends at her school, or at least ones she considers real. but she's still able to make sardonic comments the same as ever, and is a remarkable person. hanna, according to becca, who was her default best friend for a little bit, broke up with jenn and anna in some fight that everyone in the city heard about, became something of a punk (or something) and is now "hannarexic". that is, she subsists on cheerios and diet coke.
how bizarre.
NERVZ
well, i somehow managed to get through my presentation. i was completely ready for it, but i felt like when i got up there, i fell apart. maybe it was because i was ready, then the computer didn't work and i had to go later. maybe it was because people came to see me. plus i'm just bad at public speaking.
i left early so i could get a ride home, and my parents decided to stop in palo alto. i cannot stand palo alto. i just can't. now they're talking about how theymight want to get a condo there and i'm thinking no, how can you do this to me? i bet karin will go to stanford or some other place like that. how can they do this to me? how can my family turn into yuppie scum on me just when i thought they were cool?
i need to retreat into the grime of my city. i need to go live in a miniature dorm room and become a real student. god help me.
ugh. i'm having cramps. what a pain.
well, i somehow managed to get through my presentation. i was completely ready for it, but i felt like when i got up there, i fell apart. maybe it was because i was ready, then the computer didn't work and i had to go later. maybe it was because people came to see me. plus i'm just bad at public speaking.
i left early so i could get a ride home, and my parents decided to stop in palo alto. i cannot stand palo alto. i just can't. now they're talking about how theymight want to get a condo there and i'm thinking no, how can you do this to me? i bet karin will go to stanford or some other place like that. how can they do this to me? how can my family turn into yuppie scum on me just when i thought they were cool?
i need to retreat into the grime of my city. i need to go live in a miniature dorm room and become a real student. god help me.
ugh. i'm having cramps. what a pain.
MY WONDERFUL LIFE
almost time for my presentation. i think my dad is coming down to watch me, but hopefully he won't bring karin and susie. they'd be bored to death and then harass me about it later.
and then i will leave. just one more week. bahahaha! *snort*
last night: watched breakfast club. i remind myself of a cross between two people in that movie. yes.
almost time for my presentation. i think my dad is coming down to watch me, but hopefully he won't bring karin and susie. they'd be bored to death and then harass me about it later.
and then i will leave. just one more week. bahahaha! *snort*
last night: watched breakfast club. i remind myself of a cross between two people in that movie. yes.
torstai, elokuu 2
A RAT'S ASS
went to see _the score_ last night with meredith and andrea. it was good. very exciting. but before that, we had to smuggle pizza into the theater in my backpack. plus the guard was wondering if we were all the right age when we went in. i would have shown him my id, but i was holding a soda up my sleeve.
almost just one more week left.
right now karin has susie over for the night. oh well. susie doesn't bother me as much as some of her other friends, who are not just loud but also say inane things and giggle like bulldozers.
went to see _the score_ last night with meredith and andrea. it was good. very exciting. but before that, we had to smuggle pizza into the theater in my backpack. plus the guard was wondering if we were all the right age when we went in. i would have shown him my id, but i was holding a soda up my sleeve.
almost just one more week left.
right now karin has susie over for the night. oh well. susie doesn't bother me as much as some of her other friends, who are not just loud but also say inane things and giggle like bulldozers.
THE JOYS OF PUBLIC TRANSIT
this morning's muni ride: had to sprint for the train. almost fell over and made it just in time. some random kind person held the door for me in spite of the ear-splitting noise it makes when obstructed. on the train: saw the same usual people i see. no sudden stops. i have noticed that i have the exact same commute as this girl with a tan eddie bauer backpack with a flower patch on it. we ride the same muni/caltrain times and i think she gets off just before me, at california avenue or something. relatively good day.
yesterday's evening ride: left the office at 4:12 to catch shuttle. got on castro shuttle at 4th and king because of giants' game. tranferred to l taraval (boeing car) at embarcadero. the train proceeded to go fine to montgomery station--and then broke down between montgomery and powell. well, it didn't break. the emergency brake came on and wouldn't turn off, so we were stuck. the driver didn't say for ten minutes what was wrong. we just sort of listened to the beep and hum of the air conditioner, being the patient commuters that we were. except that there were a lot of passengers, and the old cars aren't air conditioned, so it began to get stuffy. i started to panic. fortunately i didn't faint or anything. anyway, when the mechanic finally came, the doors opened, and someone tried to get off the train. then we got yelled at for a while by the driver on the dangers of exiting the train. when we got to powell, i had to wait for another train to come, and that took a while.
caltrain: evidently someone paid attention to the guy who was loudly complaining about my stocking feet on the seat, because today they instated their new policy of no feet whatsoever near the seats. except they didn't pay attention to the dude across the aisle from me, whose feet lay atop a pile of newspapers while he slept. my favorite conductors are: mj (woman on the 7:25 express, "no shoes on the seats, and no painting your fingernails or your toenails on the train." "next stop is MOUNtain view."), and joe ("is that lunch for me?") and thomas (lets random people announce the stops, very nice) on the 4:27 train to sf.
shuttle: the normal bus is broken or in use or something, so instead of just sending charlie in the bus, they send two buses that are half as long which drive right behind each other. the new non-charlie driver sucks. he can't figure out the door contraption. was stuck on the second one today with five other people, including a guy who looks like an ex-dot-commer who talked loudly to his friend from the same building about some remix of something he did. the whole. freaking. time.
this morning's muni ride: had to sprint for the train. almost fell over and made it just in time. some random kind person held the door for me in spite of the ear-splitting noise it makes when obstructed. on the train: saw the same usual people i see. no sudden stops. i have noticed that i have the exact same commute as this girl with a tan eddie bauer backpack with a flower patch on it. we ride the same muni/caltrain times and i think she gets off just before me, at california avenue or something. relatively good day.
yesterday's evening ride: left the office at 4:12 to catch shuttle. got on castro shuttle at 4th and king because of giants' game. tranferred to l taraval (boeing car) at embarcadero. the train proceeded to go fine to montgomery station--and then broke down between montgomery and powell. well, it didn't break. the emergency brake came on and wouldn't turn off, so we were stuck. the driver didn't say for ten minutes what was wrong. we just sort of listened to the beep and hum of the air conditioner, being the patient commuters that we were. except that there were a lot of passengers, and the old cars aren't air conditioned, so it began to get stuffy. i started to panic. fortunately i didn't faint or anything. anyway, when the mechanic finally came, the doors opened, and someone tried to get off the train. then we got yelled at for a while by the driver on the dangers of exiting the train. when we got to powell, i had to wait for another train to come, and that took a while.
caltrain: evidently someone paid attention to the guy who was loudly complaining about my stocking feet on the seat, because today they instated their new policy of no feet whatsoever near the seats. except they didn't pay attention to the dude across the aisle from me, whose feet lay atop a pile of newspapers while he slept. my favorite conductors are: mj (woman on the 7:25 express, "no shoes on the seats, and no painting your fingernails or your toenails on the train." "next stop is MOUNtain view."), and joe ("is that lunch for me?") and thomas (lets random people announce the stops, very nice) on the 4:27 train to sf.
shuttle: the normal bus is broken or in use or something, so instead of just sending charlie in the bus, they send two buses that are half as long which drive right behind each other. the new non-charlie driver sucks. he can't figure out the door contraption. was stuck on the second one today with five other people, including a guy who looks like an ex-dot-commer who talked loudly to his friend from the same building about some remix of something he did. the whole. freaking. time.
TODAY'S FUN
six hours of listening to oral presentations made by other people in my program. good side: other people's projects are almost as boring as mine. bad side: six hours. dr. hill's pathetic comments. him yelling at me for reasons that i still can't figure out.
more later.
six hours of listening to oral presentations made by other people in my program. good side: other people's projects are almost as boring as mine. bad side: six hours. dr. hill's pathetic comments. him yelling at me for reasons that i still can't figure out.
more later.
keskiviikko, elokuu 1
PART III
sitting around waiting for christine to get back so i can show her my presentation slides.
meanwhile, jen and i are planning to write an age together. it'll be called te'anka, of course, because that's what he always names them. i need inspiration for the environment. my last one, which i completely forget the name of but still have the descriptions saved, was a desert. a very nice desert, but it doesn't lend itself easily to being one of an important person like my character is. nor does it seem like a happy place to live half the time.
anyway, i still have to rebuild my house so that he can move in. unless he never forgives me for not watching star trek.
sitting around waiting for christine to get back so i can show her my presentation slides.
meanwhile, jen and i are planning to write an age together. it'll be called te'anka, of course, because that's what he always names them. i need inspiration for the environment. my last one, which i completely forget the name of but still have the descriptions saved, was a desert. a very nice desert, but it doesn't lend itself easily to being one of an important person like my character is. nor does it seem like a happy place to live half the time.
anyway, i still have to rebuild my house so that he can move in. unless he never forgives me for not watching star trek.
DOMESTIC DREAMS
part II
well, i thought about it for about two seconds. i don't want to have kids. not natural ones, that is. no, i've seen _miracle of life_ about seven times too many. i want to make enough money to be comfortable but not enough to be uncomfortable. i want to live in a house that doesn't look exactly like the ones on either side. if that's the case, i'll paint it with spirals. no lawn. i want a cactus garden. i want a car that doesn't mind being hit or having bumper stickers on it and is electric or hybrid. i want to marry a guy that doesn't mind that i'm a total bitch. our wedding will be in city hall. i'll wear jeans. he'll wear jeans.
the end.
part II
well, i thought about it for about two seconds. i don't want to have kids. not natural ones, that is. no, i've seen _miracle of life_ about seven times too many. i want to make enough money to be comfortable but not enough to be uncomfortable. i want to live in a house that doesn't look exactly like the ones on either side. if that's the case, i'll paint it with spirals. no lawn. i want a cactus garden. i want a car that doesn't mind being hit or having bumper stickers on it and is electric or hybrid. i want to marry a guy that doesn't mind that i'm a total bitch. our wedding will be in city hall. i'll wear jeans. he'll wear jeans.
the end.
DREEM
file under disturbing.
i dreamt that i married tommy. (yes, that's right. pattt.) in this dream i was about 35 and i was teaching at santa cruz. so was my...uh...loving husband. except he was a history prof, not astronomy. we had a 5-year-old son.
it's weird, because i don't have fantasies about a domestic life. i've never dreamed about getting married or having a house or kids or anything. i've never daydreamed about it either. no, my daydreams are definitely not domestic.
file under disturbing.
i dreamt that i married tommy. (yes, that's right. pattt.) in this dream i was about 35 and i was teaching at santa cruz. so was my...uh...loving husband. except he was a history prof, not astronomy. we had a 5-year-old son.
it's weird, because i don't have fantasies about a domestic life. i've never dreamed about getting married or having a house or kids or anything. i've never daydreamed about it either. no, my daydreams are definitely not domestic.
IT'S THE SHIZNIT
i got an email that said my portfolio pages should have been in sheet protectors. now, i already spent a great deal of time make the pages look "nice" by using powerpoint, the program from hell, to make them. and i added clipart. and photos of myself. and. i. added. borders. i voluntarily used powerpoint to make a useless portfolio of myself. do i not get brownie points for that?
*sigh*
i'm fucking sick of slick presentations. i made the stupid portfolio and thought of lists of personal qualities and all i get back is "you should have used sheet protectors?" that just makes me want to use them less. they're frivolous items which make the pages shiny, and if there is a lot of light, then the glare is horrendous. plus they're a waste of plastic.
it's not the fact that i have to use sheet protectors. it's just the whole business ideal of presentation over content. to me, business seems nothing but people in meetings discussing the format of things. where does the actual work take place? how are there so many people that want to do this every day to make a living. shuffling money from place to place. organizing consumers. what a way to live.
i just feel so fake. confined. judged. more than anything, i feel judged. i know that soon i'm going to have to have college interviews, where appearance is half the fight. i'll have to wear formal clothes, which i hate. (for me, formalwear is everyone else's casual friday wear.) i'll have to regulate my tone of voice, posture, facial expression, attitude, manner of speaking, word choice, hairstyle, makeup, clothing, shoes, paperwork, etc. i'll have to present a resume or portfolio, but i refuse to use sheet protectors. they don't care about half of what i say, as long as i say it correctly. i could tell a story about my lack of prom date and they'll smile and nod, as long as i don't say "like" every other word or have the cadence of my voice go up at the end of every sentence.
perhaps i should just go become a hippie.
i got an email that said my portfolio pages should have been in sheet protectors. now, i already spent a great deal of time make the pages look "nice" by using powerpoint, the program from hell, to make them. and i added clipart. and photos of myself. and. i. added. borders. i voluntarily used powerpoint to make a useless portfolio of myself. do i not get brownie points for that?
*sigh*
i'm fucking sick of slick presentations. i made the stupid portfolio and thought of lists of personal qualities and all i get back is "you should have used sheet protectors?" that just makes me want to use them less. they're frivolous items which make the pages shiny, and if there is a lot of light, then the glare is horrendous. plus they're a waste of plastic.
it's not the fact that i have to use sheet protectors. it's just the whole business ideal of presentation over content. to me, business seems nothing but people in meetings discussing the format of things. where does the actual work take place? how are there so many people that want to do this every day to make a living. shuffling money from place to place. organizing consumers. what a way to live.
i just feel so fake. confined. judged. more than anything, i feel judged. i know that soon i'm going to have to have college interviews, where appearance is half the fight. i'll have to wear formal clothes, which i hate. (for me, formalwear is everyone else's casual friday wear.) i'll have to regulate my tone of voice, posture, facial expression, attitude, manner of speaking, word choice, hairstyle, makeup, clothing, shoes, paperwork, etc. i'll have to present a resume or portfolio, but i refuse to use sheet protectors. they don't care about half of what i say, as long as i say it correctly. i could tell a story about my lack of prom date and they'll smile and nod, as long as i don't say "like" every other word or have the cadence of my voice go up at the end of every sentence.
perhaps i should just go become a hippie.